


Jewels of Radiant Garden

by LovelyJasmari



Series: Kalai ~ Daughter of the Wind Main Canon [5]
Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Fluff, Family Drama, Gen, Inner Demons, Original Character-centric, Past Abuse, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, cavern of remembrance is canon in this, data battles are canon in this, nothing but angst in the first three chapters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-05
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-05-15 11:23:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 34,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19294738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LovelyJasmari/pseuds/LovelyJasmari
Summary: Sequel/Midquel to Seeking Purpose which takes place within the time period between the final chapter and the epilogue, post KH3.The Keyblade War is over. Radiant Garden is restored and all seems to be back to normal, maybe even better. Finally reunited with her castle family, Kalai prepares to officially become a member of the Royal Guard just like her father. But traumatic shadows from the past threaten to destroy her happy new life before it even has begun.Accompanying Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0jJWAqPzdEjmU1DUP1nD0aThis work is now complete, Kalai's story concludes in the fifth and final work in this series: Lights Lessons.NOTE 4/11/20This work will soon undergo a heavy rewrite with several edits including the three new chapters. I'll begin towards the end of the month and be finished on 6/5/20.





	1. Sins of the Fathers

**Author's Note:**

> This will be a relatively short work. The timeline is set about two months after the Final Battle and up to the day of her reunion with Lauriam and Elrena. 
> 
> In this we will dive deeper into Kalai’s relationship with her two sisters and the other apprentices as well as see the return of Kali. This work will also explain, in part, how and why she gets a keyblade.

~~~

_"Leave me alone!"_

_The shadowy apparition would not relent. It's chilling laughter echoed in Kalai's ears until she was certain they were bleeding. Even with her eyes shut, she knew it was beside her, taunting her. There was no escape._

_"Why do you continue to deny my existence?"_

_She was free from the old man's influence. Why was this demon still tormenting her? It had now been nearly two months since she had returned to humanity. Everything should have gone back to normal._

_But things were never that simple. Soon after returning home, Even had insisted on running more tests on her heart to be sure that Xehanort's essence was gone for good. It was indeed, but there was now a different sort of darkness within her heart that, while in a dormant state, still had the potential to harm in the future._

_What Kalai had not told him was that she knew where the darkness had come from, and while it may be dormant in her heart, it was not dormant in her mind. In her dreams._

_"What do I need to do to get rid of you?!"_

_"You'll never get rid of me, Kalai. All you can do is accept me."_

_"I'll NEVER accept you!"_

_"But I am you, Kalai. There is darkness in every heart. I am yours. To not accept me is to not accept yourself."_

_Kali reached out to her true form, pulling her into a sea of murky darkness. The more Kalai struggled to free herself, the tighter she held her. And the more unbearable her laughter became._

_"Are you honestly telling me you don't harbor any resentment at all? No regret? No heartbreak?"_

_"Shut up!"_

_"Have you forgotten them already? Are you really so cruel?"_

_"I SAID SHUT UP!"_

_The shadow only grinned before leaning into her. "_ _Stop denying me, Kalai. I don't want to hurt you. I want to make you stronger."_

_"I can be strong without darkness!"_

_"Oh, really?"_

_Kali vanished. In the next moment, the apparition of a young girl sat beside her, weeping. It was her, as a lonely child before her life in the castle. When all she knew was abuse and indifference._

_"Why do they hate me?"_

_Kalai tried to comfort the child, but her hands with right through her. An illusion that melted away at once, and Kali wrapped her arms around her._

_"See what I mean, Kalai? You need me."_

_"NO!!!"_

_She jerked away, extending her hands as if she were about to summon Stormborn. That is, if she could still use it. Nothing came and Kali laughed._

_"No matter what you do, no matter how much you try, I will always be here…"_

_The shadow placed her hand on Kalai's chest, at her heart. Her hand slowly moved up her neck and she cupped her cheek affectionately. It was strangely comforting. Tears melted in the eyes of her true form and a twisted smile came to her face._

_"You're no different than that little girl." She said. "Still a crybaby. Remember how Lucio used to call you that?"_

_Now Kali had done it. Bringing up her stepbrother or any of her past family was crossing a line Kalai would not forgive. Her hands descended onto the neck of the shadow._

_"I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP!"_

_She shook her neck violently until Kali finally began to melt away into darkness, leaving her alone at last. Falling to her knees, she did not notice how the murky dark ground was swallowing her. The only thing that occupied her thoughts were her fears of her shadow returning. And the tears that resulted._

~~~

"Kalai! Kalai, wake up!"

Firmly but gently, Dilan shook his daughter awake from her nightmare. At once she realized where she was and pressed herself to her father. He sighed.

"What is ailing you, sweet girl? This is the third time this week this has happened. Where are these nightmares coming from?"

It took her a few moments to gain her composure. Gazing out her window, she could see that it was thankfully morning. She would not have to worry about Kali tormenting her anymore anytime soon.

"I wish...I knew."

This was only half the truth. Kalai knew exactly where they were coming from but what she did not know was why. Xehanort was gone and his influence upon his heart gone along with him. There should be no reason for her to still be suffering like this.

Unless...the darkness currently feeding her shadowy other really was her own…

No. Her heart was strong. Strong enough to combat the darkness. Kali did not stand a chance. Those were her thoughts as Kalai forced herself out of her bed.

"Are you sure you're ready to leave the castle?" He asked softly. "According to Aerith it had taken you a few months before to make a full recovery."

"It's been long enough." She replied. "It's time. Besides, Xion is returning to Twilight Town tomorrow. I promised her we would spend the day together before she departed."

Despite his worry, Dilan smiled at her. He always knew she was strong. Now was no different. But even so, he could never entirely rid himself of his natural parental concern for her. Especially since she now knew the truth. He took her hand and guided her to her feet.

"Very well, child. If you think you are ready. I'll leave you now to prepare for the day." He walked towards her door, turning back to smile at her once more. "But do not forget, the days grow shorter as winter draws nearer. You have training with Isa this afternoon. Aeleus and I shall be watching and taking note of your improvements."

For his sake, Kalai smiled back at her father. But the moment the door was closed, she fell back onto her bed and groaned. Sometime before the fall of Radiant Garden, Isa and Lea had become apprentices to Ansem The Wise. By that point she was living with Kairi and Lady Takara and was not aware of this. Upon returning to humanity, they both resumed their role serving her uncle. Lea as a member of the Royal Guard and Isa as a reserve member and researcher under Even. And it had been decided that she would officially begin her own apprenticeship in the new year, a little less than two months away.

Though they did not live in the castle with her, their very presence was still unsettling. They had atoned for their past sins as well, and it was partially Isa's actions that had helped her escape Xehanort's influence. But it would take some time for Kalai to see them as anyone else besides Axel and Saix. Somehow it was easier to come to an understanding with Xion than with them.

~~~

Such a glorious autumn day. Gold and crimson leaves fell softly from the trees and made a  pleasant crunching sound under their feet as they walked through the Castle Town towards Merlin's house. There was a chill in the air but it was rather comforting. This world was now truly at peace and that sense of peace seemed to carry itself throughout the autumn air.  

Every now and then someone would greet them, waving or sometimes even bowing respectfully to Kalai. By now it was common knowledge that she was a niece to their ruler and would soon join the Royal Guard. Many of the inhabitants had known her as the mysterious child rarely seen outside the castle walls from years ago, and admired for her gracious manners and charm when she was seen. So much so that she had earned the sobriquet "Jewel of Radiant Garden."

Kalai, for her part, was warmed by the kindness of those who lived there with her. And she was glad she had only been in this world once since it's fall to darkness. Now the Capital of Light appeared as it had always been in her childhood. In some ways, even better. And she knew she had the Restoration Committee to thank for it.

"So, you're going back to Twilight Town tomorrow." She said to Xion as they walked along. "It's been nice having you here with us."

"Yeah, Roxas and his friends got me a job working at the bistro there." The younger girl replied. "But I've enjoyed being here. This place is so beautiful, and it's nice being around you guys...outside…"

She bit her lip and lowered her eyes in thought. Kalai glanced at her.

"Outside?"

"Outside...the Organization…"

Kalai could tell that the topic was an uncomfortable one for the younger girl. And truthfully, it was for her as well. Xion had been the one to eliminate her Nobody the first time. It had not been her fault though, Saix had manipulated her into doing it. The aftermath had left her extremely distressed, and Kalai could tell that she still harbored deep remorse for it. Perhaps if circumstances had been different, they might have become as close as she had been to Roxas and Axel. For this reason alone, it was easy for her to forgive the girl.

"Well, rest assured we enjoy you being here too."

They made their way to the magician's house. Merlin had been visiting the castle twice weekly to assist Kalai in improving her magical skills. But now that she was up and out, she felt it was only right that today she come to him.

"The way you handle fire and ice has greatly improved Miss Kalai." Said the old man once their lessons for the day were complete. "It is obvious though that your strong suit is wind."

She smiled at this, she was indeed her father's daughter.

"However," He continued. "Your grasp over the thunder element still leaves a lot to be desired."

Thunder. Merlin was correct on that note. It had never been an element easy for her to master handle well. Unlike…

A bittersweet memory of her female lover came to her along with a sudden burning sensation that to her eyes. She quickly bit the inside of her mouth to stop it. There would be plenty of time to cry in the privacy of her room once the day was over. Thankfully it appeared that neither Merlin nor Xion had noticed. Kalai knew she had to get a grip, Larxene would surely get on her for crying if she was there. 

~~~

After her magic lesson, she and Xion ran a few errands, including taking the younger girl to pick out some new clothes. In the last few months after the Final Battle, Xion had only worn the old clothes that belonged to Kalai at her age. They fit her well enough, but it was time for her to have things of her own to begin her new life.

Shopping was something nearly any girl could enjoy, and Kalai managed to forget her sadness momentarily as she helped her friend pick out several new outfits and pairs of shoes. One ensemble Xion loved so much she decided to wear it for the rest of the day; a frilled black top with a cute white skirt and boots that matched very well. They loved everything they chose, but the final price of everything was another matter entirely.

"58,000 munny." Said the shop clerk when the time came to pay, causing the girls to give each other a look of uncertainty before Kalai laughed it off.

"No problem!" She said. "No problem at all!"

"But won't your uncle be mad at us for spending so much?"

"Doubtful. It's not like he doesn't have it, being king and all!"

"You sure?"

"He may be surprised, but hey, you needed clothes. And it's not as bad as…" she stopped mid-sentence.

"As bad as?"

"Oh, I just remembered someone from my past who spent a lot. Or better yet, her father spent a lot on her. Like one time, she bragged to me that he had spent more than a hundred thousand munny on her in one afternoon."

"Seriously?!" Xion laughed. "In that case, I don't feel bad anymore."

 _Glad you think it's funny._ Kalai thought. _Cause at the time, I was sick with jealousy. Lucia was such a spoiled brat, and I never got new things unless mom pressured him._

Their last errand was at the Moogle Shop to pick up some synthesis materials and pay a visit to their charming assistant Miss Daphne. In the old days, she had been a favorite of the young Kalai and Ienzo and they had long suspected that she and Aeleus were secretly in love with each other, but both were too shy to ever admit to such a thing. She greeted the girls with a friendly smile.

"Well, it's always nice seeing you here, Miss. How are you improving your training?"

"Very good, thank you," Kalai replied, grinning a little. "Actually, I was wondering, will you be coming to the New Years' ball after my ceremony?"

"Perhaps, if I don't have too much work to do here."

"Forget work, kupo!" Said the Moogle floating nearby. "An invitation to Lord Ansem's castle is not something to take lightly, kupo! I'm sure we'll be fine, kupo!"

"Yeah! And besides." Kalai's lips curved into a sly smirk. "I'm sure Aeleus would be veeeeryy happy if you did come!"

"What? I mean...oh...Miss Kalai!"

"Hey, isn't he one of the Royal Guards, kupo? He was here a few days ago looking for you when you were making deliveries, kupo!"

"HUH??"

Her pale face was awash with scarlet embarrassment. Kalai and Xion snickered to themselves. The older girl was secretly determined that the two come to terms with their mutual affection by New Year's Eve. It would be so romantic, the thought of Aeleus and Daphne confessing their love for each other after such a long time apart. Just like when she and…

No. Not again. She was thinking about them again. A sick feeling came into her stomach, and she blinked away a tear that surprised her by forming. Unfortunately, it seemed like Xion had noticed.

"Something wrong?"

"Oh, nothing." She lied. "Just remembered I have training with Isa soon. We should probably make our way back now."

"Leaving already?" Miss Daphne asked. "Well, give my kind regards to His Lordship. And to your father as well."

"I will. And I'll give your regards to Aeleus too!"

Kalai and Xion quickly turned around out of the store, giggling before the shop assistant could say or do anything else besides stare behind them with fluttering grey eyes and blushing cheeks.

They made their way back to the castle. Kalai was sure that they had not been out that long, and she still had time for training. So she was surprised to see Lea running from the castle towards them.

"What's going on?" Asked Xion.

"Nothing serious." The redhead replied. "It's just…" Kalai noticed that he appeared nervous.

"Just what?"

"You have a visitor. Two, in fact."

 _Visitors? How interesting._ She thought. There wasn't anyone she could think of that would be coming to the castle to see her at this time of day. No one except...maybe…

_Marluxia! Larxene! They found me! They're at the castle waiting for me!_

Kalai did not dare voice her hopes but instead rushed past Lea and Xion and ran faster than she had ever run before in her life, her eyes shining with joy and expectation. Yes. It had to be them. It was the only thing that made sense. Who else in the world could possibly be waiting for her?

She made her way up towards the long body of stairs leading to the front doors of the castle. Standing outside were Aeleus and Dilan, keeping guard as always. The miffed look of concern was etched on the latter's face and did not escape Kalai's notice. She smiled.

"Lea said I have visitors?"

"Yes, they're in the library."

There was a strange monotone coldness in his voice that concerned her. Hadn't her father already come to accept her love for them? Lea finally caught up with her, breathless with Xion following behind him soon after.

"Geez, I really am out of shape, Xion!" He laughed. "Guess she's really excited to reunite with them."

Of course, she was! Kalai temporarily forgot the concerning expression on her father's face and made her way into the castle. Dilan and Aeleus gave each other a knowing expression that Lea could not help but find concerning as well.

"I...didn't even know she had sisters."

"Kalai has sisters?" Xion asked. "How come she never mentioned…"

"Kalai is my only child. Before you ask." Dilan replied brusquely. "Though they share the same mother. That is most evident in Irissa, the older one."

"Do you think…" Aeleus hesitated. "It's okay for Kalai to meet with them now?"

"They appeared not to have malicious intent. And they are still of the blood of His Lordship. That alone gives them the right to be here. Whatever...our own thoughts may be."

~~~

Kalai could not think of any other instance in her life where she had been more terribly disappointed and heartbroken than when she entered the library, and Marluxia and Larxene were not sitting there waiting for her. Instead, there were two young girls, younger than herself. Two she had thought (better yet hoped) that she would never see again.

One, about the same age as Xion, with rich auburn hair pinned neatly into an elegant bun. The other, slightly younger girl, with long sandy brown curls that tumbled down her back and shoulders. They both seemed as surprised to see Kalai as she was to see them, but also happy. The younger girl rose from her chair and surprised her by putting her arms around her affectionately. She looked up at the older girl with a big smile.

"She's a lot taller than I remember!" At this the older redhead laughed.

"Well you were only three when you last saw her." She also rose to her feet to greet their sister. "Do you remember us, Kalai? I'm Iris, and that's Adelen. We're your…"

"I know who you are!" Kalai snapped, perhaps a little too quickly. Iris' face immediately melted into sadness. "Why are you here?!"

"I'm sorry." sighed the younger girl. "I know...this may seem like...an unpleasant shock...but...but…"

"We've been looking for you!" Adelen chimed in. "We wanted to say we're sorry for how our father treated you and…"

"Please let ME explain this!" Iris interrupted, taking Kalai's hands and pulling her into a nearby chair. The older girl reluctantly obliged.

"I always wondered why our father and the others were so cruel to you and now...Adelen and I...we know...it's…"

"None of your concern!" A wave of emotions was beginning to overwhelm her, but for the sake of not being rude, Kalai continued listening.

"It is. It wasn't right! How you were sent away like that! Even before that, how Lucio and Lucia always…"

"I'm much happier here! Happier than I ever was at home! I have my father, my true father, here with me."

"Yes, we see that. But when mother died…"

"Ugh!!!"

She jerked away from Iris and turned her back to her. Anger burned in her at the recollection of how their father had hated her so much that she was not even allowed to attend her funeral. It was at that moment that Kalai determined that she was truly alone in the world. And all because she had the audacity to be another man's child. Iris knew what was hurting her and tried to explain further, even as she felt her own emotions begin to overwhelm her as well. 

"Please, Kalai! We were all still children at the time! There wasn't anything we could do! I tried to persuade him to let you come say goodbye but he shot me down. That's when he told me about Dilan. Even then, it didn't make sense to me, and Adelen understood even less!"

Objectively speaking, Kalai knew Iris was not at fault for her anger and sorrow. She was six years younger than herself, and Adelen was even younger by eight years. They had all been so young, but at that moment, her feelings would not allow her to be objective. She rose from her chair.

"Why are you here NOW?!"

"Last year, something terrible happened. These...creatures, dark creatures appeared and attacked the manor. There was one in particular...like some demon...ugh!!"

Iris wrapped her arms around her trembling body at the recollection in a way that Kalai could not help but find sympathizing. Doubly so when Adelen began to softly weep. She understood what had happened, there was no doubt in her mind. Heartless. The dark monsters had ravaged the Capital of Light so it was only natural that they would destroy the outer provinces as well. 

"The demon took our father away!" Adelen said at last. "And after that we were all separated and wandered around for a long time before things returned to normal. Lucio took over our fathers estate but he and Lucia are awful! Absolutely…"

"What Adelen is trying to say is that we had a falling out with them. We wanted to bring you back but they didn't like the idea. And beyond that, they are just, well, pardon my language, fucking horrible people! But I'm sure you already know that."

"I _always_ knew that!" Kalai barked, the cruel memories returning and making quick work of any sympathy she had. "They seemed to like you two well enough when we were all kids. You all would share dolls and toys and I hardly ever got anything! You were all painted together with mother and I was excluded."

"That's not our fault! We're sorry!" Tears began to melt into Iris' deep blue eyes. "Please, Kalai we have nowhere else to go! We just want things to be different. We want…"

"Most of my life I was convinced no one loved me! You can thank your father for that! Him and those two assholes! All those nights I cried alone in my closet because of it! When I read mother's last letter to me I found out how wrong I was but it didn't matter because I never had a chance to say goodbye to her! I was never given that chance! I don't even know where she's buried!"

By now, her anger had enough time to develop into fury. But Iris understood that her oldest sister's anger was valid and did not dare to say anything.

"Can you imagine how lonely I felt?! How much it hurt to feel like I really had no one? No. But who really ever cared about dusky half-wit Kalai, always getting angry at everyone and getting into fights with Lucio. Such a crybaby. Remember that's what he called me? And then I realized why. I realized who my father truly was. And he was always more of a father to me than Lord Rowan ever was! Even before I knew the truth!"

"Kalai... I'm sorry! We're sorry! We..."

Now the tears were flowing from Iris without restraint, tears of guilt, and regret. Perhaps this had not been a good idea. But all she and Adelen wanted was to end the terrible cycle. Kalai had not been the only one to suffer, they knew their mother had suffered as well. She had loved them, of course, but Kalai's father was the man she had truly wished she could have married. And her death in childbirth had been a horrible one indeed.

"I'm happy now. Happier than I ever DREAMED I could be!" Kalai went on. "And now you two want to uproot that happiness and just waltz into my life like nothing ever happened?!"

Kalai had enough. With this last statement, she stormed out of the library, slamming the door and leaving her sisters to stare at it in bewildered despair. No. This had not been a good idea, after all, Iris could see that now, and so could Adelen. 

After a few moments, Dilan entered the room, followed by their uncle and a young man they had not seen before. Iris couldn't help but find him incredibly attractive in spite of her sorrow.

"Well...that didn't go as well as I hoped." she sighed. "I should have known. Forgive us for intruding like this. We'll leave..."

"Nonsense." Ansem The Wise said kindly. "You are my blood, just as Kalai is my blood. You all have a place here."

"I imagine she was more than a little shocked at your presence," Dilan observed wryly.

"More than a little," Adelen replied. "I don't think…"

"We'll talk to her." said the young man, smiling a little. "In the meantime, you two are more than welcome to stay here."

"Thank you." Iris smiled at him, hoping her face did not betray the odd feelings she was currently experiencing. "By the way, I don't think we met you when we first arrived, what's your name?"

"I'm Ienzo."

"Pleased to meet you, Ienzo. I'm Irissa. But, please call me Iris."

Adelen noticed the slight red tint on her sister's cheeks but said nothing. Wasn't Ienzo the adoptive son of Ansem The Wise and heir to this realm? Perhaps they would have a reason to stay after all.

~~~

Kalai ran back to her room, shutting herself up into her closet just as she had always done as a child when she was distraught. Her mind was a torrent of emotions, all of them negative, and her heart was consumed with sorrow.

_Family reunion not what you were expecting?_

She jumped at the voice, but she knew who it was. Of all the times to come and torment her.

_I thought you were me! You should know!_

_Sarcasm, Rosebud. Figured you'd know it when you heard it since Larxene was the Queen of Sarcasm._

_What do you want now?!_

_What I always wanted. For you to accept me._

_SHUT UP! How many times do I have to tell you…_

With a sly chuckle, Kali's form appeared outside the closet. Kalai could see her golden gaze peering into the crack of the door. Her body froze with terror as she prayed that she would not open it. No such luck, she pulled the door open and giggled at how Kalai covered her face, whimpering and cowering under her. 

"Poor thing." She said teasingly, staring down at her true form. "It's just like when you were little. Always crying in the closet and asking yourself over and over why they hated you."

"SHUT UP OR I'LL MAKE YOU SHUT UP!"

"See, it's that anger that you need in order to deal with those who have wronged you. Why not start with them?"

"They're not staying here if I have any say in it!"

"Perhaps. But your hurt will still be there whether or not they stay."

"Yeah? So what?! What's your fucking point?!"

"Remember how excited you were? Thinking that Marluxia and Larxene has finally found you? Just to see two of your awful…"

"They'll come for me eventually. I know they will!"

"No, they won't."

Kali grabbed at Kalai's hands and dragged her out of her hiding place. Kalai was in no mood for her shadows torment and took a nearby chair, and struck it at her. Her form vanished, but her cruel laughter continued, and her voice taunted her still.

_They're never coming back! You'll never see them again! And now your sisters are here to make your life a living hell once more! Accept your sorrow and form it into rage! Let it empower you! Become empowered by the darkness!_

She collapsed onto her bed, screaming into her pillow in the hopes of drowning out the voice. Screaming all her feelings into her pillow as well. There seemed to be much to cry about. Kalai had been so sure that Marluxia and Larxene had finally found her. She should have known that such a thing would have been too perfect. But she did not expect that it would be her two sisters waiting for her instead.

Truthfully, Iris and Adelen had been very young when she had been sent away. Too young for them to form any real relationship. Occasionally Iris did taunt her, but she seemed only to be following the example of Lucio and Lucia. And Adelen, she was never even allowed to see, still being a baby when she had been sent away. They could hardly be blamed for her sorrow. But in her mind, they still represented her past life. All the pain and everything she was not that made her unworthy of love for so long.

There was a gentle knock at her door and she groaned out loud.

"Go away!"

The door opened slowly, but she made no objection. It would probably be useless anyway. Dilan sat next to her and gazed at her thoughtfully.

"Well, I can't say I'm exactly pleased with your rudeness." He began. "But in this case…"

"RUDENESS?!" She jumped up from her pillow at once. "They show up here uninvited, thinking they can stay here and we can all be sisters again like some novel and I'M the rude one?!"

"If you would let me finish." Raising his palm to silence her. "In this case I understand your pain. Probably better than anyone else. Your feelings are not invalid, Kalai."

"Then why did you call me rude?"

"Because they are still your sisters and still your family. And they were so young when you were brought here. I would be surprised if they remember any of what you suffered at all."

"They do! I'm sure of it!"

"And even if they did…"

"Shouldn't you be on MY side?!" She asked. "Because of that man, their father, you couldn't be with my mother! It's not fair!"

"Life is not always fair, child." He replied, his tone softening some. "But we must still live it. I will not lie and say I have come to terms with how things went but what matters to me now is you. Your mother would want what is best for you and now it is in my power to give you that. But she would also want what is best for her other children as well. And if that means…"

Her chest burned with anger. But for the sake of her father she remained calm.

"If that means that they would be better cared for under the guardianship of Lord Ansem, then so be it."

"But...what about…"

"No buts. My own feelings on the matter are irrelevant. They are still your sisters and they are still your mothers children. Your uncle has already agreed to let them stay and I am sworn to protect this castle and all who reside here. Besides…" With a small smile. "What would your mother say if we had the opportunity to give them better lives and didn't? I don't think she'd ever forgive me."

A sigh escaped her mixed with the sobs she had been stifling back up until this moment. Kalai knew there would be no point in objecting if Ansem the Wise had decided they should stay. Just when she thought she was past all her anger and despair. But it was a huge castle. Hopefully she would not have to deal with them much. She gazed at her father, her eyes silently begging him for sympathy.

"When I arrived here, I was under the impression that I was unworthy of love," she said. "But living here taught me that was not the case. How can I possibly…"

"You are still loved, my sweet girl." Dilan seized her into an intense and comforting embrace. "How I wish I could take those years away, strip the sorrow from your heart. But I've always loved you. Nothing will change that, certainly not them." He gave her one last encouraging hug before guiding her to her feet. "Now, I believe there are two people whom you must speak with."

Kalai gave no response, only allowing her father to escort her back down to the library. When they reached the door, she thought she heard the sound of soft giggling, like Iris' giggling. This piqued her curiosity and she slowly pushed the door open.

What she saw softened her heart ever so slightly. It was definitely Iris, and she was speaking to Ienzo. The way her eyes fluttered as she looked at him was a lot lost on her. A thought came to her: Kalai was aware that Ienzo still harbored feelings for her. Such love would never be given by her at this point, but it did not mean that he was unworthy of love, even if it was not her own.

She pushed the door fully open and walked into the library. She was still unsure about her sisters living with her, but of what she observed between Iris and Ienzo was anything to go on, perhaps it would not be so bad after all.

"Forgive me for my harshness." She sighed. "I didn't mean to…"

"No. You have every right." Iris interrupted. "We know how our family has treated you was cruel beyond words. But…"

"Our uncle has already said you can stay." A sharp twinge going off in her stomach. "But time will tell if we can truly be sisters."

"We understand." Replied Adelen. "We just want that chance. Please."

Kalai noticed how Iris' eyes quickly shifted towards Ienzo. She smiled in spite of herself.

"We shall see."

~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few things that are going to come up later that I best explain now to avoid confusion.
> 
> Kalai has four siblings; Lucio, Lucia, Irissa (known usually as Iris) and Adelen. Lucio is 18 months younger than her while her sisters are four, six and eight years younger respectively. She would have had another brother had her mother not died in childbirth. I kind of have a trash headcanon that Ilise is the nameless star in The Final World who speaks to Sora about her baby right as she is about to die.
> 
> Prior to the fall within my trash headcanon, Radiant Garden is something like a large principality with the main city being known simply as the Capital. Outside of the capital there are six smaller island provinces that can all be reached by those vast bridges connecting the outer gardens. All of them have different names relating to light or prosperity and the one Kalai and her sisters are from is called Halcyon. The others are called Serenitatem, Canden, Praeclarum, Caelesti and Divitiae. Each is governed by a lord answering directly to Ansem the Wise and Kalai's stepfather is one of these lords. 
> 
> Finally the "Sacred Heart" is the crest of the realm that symbolizes Kingdom Hearts which is viewed in a neo-christian sort of way. 
> 
> This is most likely going to be my most OC-centric work in this series and I understand if not many people take a liking to it because of that. But feedback is still appreciated nonetheless. Radiant Garden is such a cool place within the game and the fact we don't know more about this place (or even explore it at all in KH3) is almost criminal.


	2. Fear and Illusions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kalai struggles to adjust to the recent changes in the castle but her reluctance to accept them soon puts herself and her sisters in great danger.

~~~

_Kalai’s Journal Entry ~ Worthy of Love_

_Aeleus told me more about my parents, how they met, and how I was born. I think he was trying to help me come to better terms with this situation, but he failed terribly. They were madly in love, but mom was already engaged to marry another man better suited to her status. When I was born, her husband said he’d pass me off as his own on the condition she never have contact with my dad again. I guess “pass me off” didn’t necessarily mean “treat me well.”_

_I hate this. As if I didn’t already have too many things on my mind. Dad seems to be taking things well though, I guess for his sake, I can try to be cordial to my sisters._

_But whenever I look at them, all I can think of is how awful my life was before, how sharply it contrasted to my life here before Xehanort came and fucked everything up._

_Funny_ _, before I came to live in this castle, I just felt like everything that happened was because I deserved it. I didn't look like my mom or my siblings and therefore, I was ugly, unworthy of kindness. Unworthy of love._

_I still feel that way sometimes, but being here has made me understand that there is more in the world than cruelty and unfair treatment. I felt the same way whenever...they looked at me._

_Where are they? I know they are people again like me and everyone else here. Are they looking for me? Do they know how much my heart cries out for them?_

~~~

It was decided that Iris and Adelen would become apprentices to the castle as well, both as students of the heart. Iris, in particular, showed great intellectual potential and an interest in science, making her a favorite of Even immediately. During the first few weeks, whenever Kalai happened to come upon him in the lab or library or anywhere else in the castle, Iris was almost always by his side - when she wasn’t following behind Ienzo. 

Her infatuation with her mentor was evident to everyone except Ienzo himself. The hope that he would eventually come to like her as well was one of the few things that made her and Adelen’s presence tolerable. Kalai initially assumed he was only feigning scholarly interest to better acquaint herself with the young man, but it became clear that her intellect was not an act. This became apparent one morning when Iris attempted to help her sister with a synthesis project she was having trouble with.

“That’s a...Class A recipe, isn’t it?” she asked innocently. Kalai did not respond, and she picked up the recipe list off the table to have a look.

“I know what I’m doing.”

“I don’t doubt that, but...this could use some improvements...there’s no need to waste so many bright gems…”

“I’ve done this before!” snapped Kalai. “It’s just more difficult since I don’t have…”

“That’s my point,” Iris interrupted. “You don’t need to use bright gems since you have a Mythril... The result will be the same.”

“I’ve never heard of using a Mythril to synthesize elixir!”

“They have similar properties to bright gems but are technically a Class S material. So I imagine the result will be the same. Would you…” Iris did not wait for her sister to deny her again and took the materials from her, replacing the three bright gems with one Mythril and two blaze shards with a blaze gem. The result surprised them both when instead of elixir, megalixir was created instead. The younger girl suppressed a small smile of accomplishment and the older one glared before allowing herself a sarcastic grin. 

“Not bad, I suppose.”

“Oh come now, don’t be like that.” 

Even had been watching them and decided to make himself known at this moment. He regarded his new student with a kind smile.

“Well done, My Lady,” he said. “I can see that synthesis is a skill that runs in the family.” 

“Thank you, Even,” she replied. “But, I only thought of it because of what Ienzo showed me yesterday.” 

Kalai could not help but smile despite her irritation. But in the next moment, the scientist said something that erased her warmth as quickly as it came. 

“I imagine there may be a thing or two you can even show to your sister.”

“That won’t be necessary! Like I said, I already had it, Iris only…slightly improved on what I was already doing.”

“I’m sorry, I was just trying to help…”

_I was just trying to help..._

_If I wanted your assistance, I would have asked for it, Kalai! It’s not like you know what you're doing! Go back to your room!_

“If I wanted your assistance…” Sharpness stabbed at the older girl's stomach. “I would have asked for it!” She rose from her seat in a huff, not even bothering to pick up the megalixir she had synthesized in preparation for training that day. The door to the library slammed behind her, causing Even to sigh.

“I’m so sorry,” he said, shaking his head. “She’s usually so…”

“No, it’s my fault,” Iris said sadly. “Maybe I shouldn’t have poked my nose into her work. I just thought…I don’t know. This is going to take longer than I thought.”

“Patience, My Lady.” Even placed a hand on her shoulder and smiled again. “If your intentions are true, your sister will come around in time. Believe that.”

“I want to believe that.” She took a seat where her sister had previously been as she continued. “But...our father and older siblings were always so terrible to Kalai. I remember one incident vividly where our brother, Lucio, took one of her dolls and she tried to chase him to get it back. He pushed her off a balcony and she broke her arm. But our father blamed her.”

“That’s horrible!” 

Iris turned her head and saw Ienzo coming into the library, taking a seat beside her. She turned her eyes away to focus on her thoughts and not the fluttering in her chest.

“But, that’s not your fault, Iris. Adults sometimes do awful things but...that doesn’t mean the children should be blamed; even if the children don't understand and…”

His ocean colored eyes lowered to his hands folded on the table. In his mind he was thinking of the awful things he did at the behest of the adults around him. He didn’t know better then, why should Iris have known better? Even seemed to understand what he was thinking.

“What Ienzo means to say, is that all you and Adelen can do is try and be kinder to her now. Kalai is headstrong but she is not cruel; in time, she will see that you are not cruel either.”

A small, sad smile came to her face. “I hope so.”

~~~

Kalai stormed through the halls of the castle, making her way towards the courtyard. Despite being so upset, she still heard a sound when passing by the upper parlor. It sounded like a harp, her harp. She peeked her head into the door, and her face twisted up at once on seeing Adelen sitting at her instrument, Isa standing beside her with a kind look on his scarred face.

“Sis!” The younger girl smiled. “I hope you don’t mind. I’m playing your harp until I get my own!” 

 _Of course, I mind!_ Her emotions flared up again at another painful recollection, one of her sitting at a very similar harp and playing while a pair of intense but kind blue eyes gazed at her with longing. Would she ever have the opportunity to look into those eyes again? 

“Music was never my thing,” admitted Isa. “I had an aunt who played harp but I had no talent for it. I still appreciate it when played well.”

“Perhaps I’ll play some later as a treat if I beat you today!” Kalai allowed herself a small smile in spite of herself. “Adelen, do you even know how to play? Who taught you?”

“Mother taught me a little,” Adelen replied. “And father had someone come in and teach Lucia and me and…”

The older girl did not hear her after that, as her thoughts clouded her mind. Their mother had loved the instrument, and even as a little girl, she had been drawn to it. Whenever she tried to play it though, her stepfather would make snide comments on her lack of skill and eventually, she stopped trying. But her other siblings had been allowed to play the instrument and one night, she even came upon them all sitting at it with their parents. It was the first time she had seen Lord Rowan show anything resembling kindness, and it was the first time Kalai had begun to question why he was always so mean to her. If he was capable of love towards them, then why not her?

“Isa!” she snapped once her mind returned to reality. “I’m going to the courtyard. Meet me there once your done wasting your time here!” 

She did not wait for his response before turning to run back down the halls, hoping to escape the anxiety building up in her. Adelen did not seem as aware of her eldest sisters animosity as Iris and turned to Isa with a smile. 

“Mind if I come watch you two? It gets so boring around here sometimes.”

“Perhaps.” He replied. “If not, maybe we can find something fun for you outside the castle.”

~~~

_Half-wit! Why can you never get that right?! Stupid girl! Why can’t you be more like Lucia!  You’re misplaying it!_

Cruel words from the past continued to ring in Kalai’s ears as she wildly swung her lance around in the courtyard. Her body moved so quickly that leaves scattered about her as her weapon slashed at the air. In her mind she was striking her stepfather and her siblings. In her mind she was also hitting her shadowy self that was still wreaking havoc in her dreams. 

_Marluxia! Larxene! Where are you?_

_Isn’t it obvious by now? They’re never coming back._

Violet eyes glared fiercely at the golden ones that looked at her with mocking and malice. She pointed her lance at Kali. 

“How nice!” She said. “I could use some practice on a moving target!”

Kali giggled and summoned a shadowy replica of Stormborn. Their weapons clashed. Even if she was only a shadow, the fight seemed real enough to Kalai and she fought as such. 

“You know they’re never coming back! Stop lying to yourself!”

“Shut up!”

“And what was that about your sisters not staying here if you had any say?”

“Well, I didn’t! But I’m only accepting it because Iris seems to like…”

The shadow jumped back and vanished in a mist of darkness. Terror struck the heart of her true form as she changed her appearance to that of The Cloaked Schemer. Her voice also changed, as well.

“What? Because you think Iris likes me? How generous of you, letting your sister have me. Your discarded seconds.”

“Excuse you?!”

“Just think, if I had only been willing to be in on your pathetic little coup. Maybe Xemnas would have been dealt with sooner. Maybe…” with a malicious grin, “...you and Marluxia would still be together.”

Kalai glared at the apparition, freezing as it approached her. He raised his hand to her but she caught it and continued to glare. 

“Too bad I was able to see the dark truth in you, treacherous whore!” Zexion pulled his hand away from her grasp and seized her neck. “And now you think you can give me your little sister and I’ll forget…”

“Shut up!” She pulled away and she struck at the shadow. Her lance passed through its form several times but it would not disappear. “Iris loves Ienzo! Not you! I would never let her heart lead her to such a callous bastard like you!”

“Oh, so now you care about her?" he smirked. "Too bad because I _am_ Ienzo.” The shadow melted back into her original form. “Just like I am _you,_ Kalai.”

“NO YOU AREN’T!”

Kali vanished before she could strike again, giggling all the while and continuing to taunt her. She was terrible for trying to push Ienzo off on Iris. Her sisters were a reminder of how alone she was. And the only people who ever loved her were gone forever. Kalai gritted her teeth to keep from crying out loud as she collapsed on the ground and continued to strike the air with her weapon.

“Now that’s not a very effective stance.” 

She brought herself to her feet and turned her head at Isa’s voice, biting back a disgusted face when she noticed Adelen standing beside him.

“Are you ready for me to kick your butt now?” 

“Not quite,” he replied.  “Your little sister is bored, so I thought we’d show her around town before we begin training.” 

Kalai could no longer conceal her irritation.

“We’ve put this off for nearly two weeks!” she snapped. “I know you guys have been busy beginning the work on reviving Namine, but come on!”

“Who said we couldn’t do that later? I thought it would be nice, you, me, her and Lea. Unless...you don’t want…”

Kalai studied his green eyes and could see that this was as much about assimilating himself with her as it was entertaining the brat. She took a few deep breaths as she thought more about it and it helped to calm herself, she would play along, for now. 

“No, it’s fine! I’ll come with you guys! I...need to clear my mind anyway.”

~~~

It was a pleasant outing though Kalai would not admit how pleasant it was. They sat together in the Fountain Court with bars of Sea Salt Ice Cream, enjoying the late autumn day. Tasting the salty sweetness, Kalai’s found herself thinking about Kairi. 

She had not seen her in many years, since the fall of Radiant Garden. Kairi had been a Princess of Heart and one of the Guardians of Light, but her heart was currently lost. And Kalai missed her. 

“Do you think we’ll ever see Kairi again,” she asked Lea. 

“Who knows,” shrugged the redhead. “I sure hope so. But even if we do...”

“We may never see Sora again,” Isa added. 

“I do hope Sora can save her,” she replied. “I’m sure it would shatter her heart if he were to be lost in the process.”

“Who’s Sora?” asked Adelen. “And who’s Kairi?”

“Kairi was a friend of mine when I first arrived here,” Kalai said. “For a long time, she was my only friend besides Ienzo. As for Sora, he was, well, I didn’t know him well but…”

“A second chance,” said Isa. “Sora was my second chance.” 

“And mine,” Lea replied. “A nice kid. Always looking out for his friends. And he and Kairi, their hearts were inseparable. It was beautiful.”

“He always had a way with hearts!” Kalai smiled. “I remember thinking so when I saw him with Rapunzel. And all the times I would talk to Namine. But Kairi was the one who truly had _his_ heart.”

“Like Ienzo has our sister's heart,” Adelen chimed in, making her older companions laugh. Even Kalai laughed a little, and with her laughter, she felt her heart beginning to open just a crack. 

“Is there someone who has your heart, Kalai?” 

Kalai did not answer her sister, and Lea and Isa gave each other knowing looks before Isa decided to answer for her.

“Kalai has…a lot of admirers,” he said with an uncertain smile, recalling how it seemed like all of the Organization fancied her at one point or another. Even he found himself taken with her stubborn charm at one point before he came to his senses. “But who has her heart? That only she knows.”

Again she smiled, in spite of herself. 

“And you, Adelen?” Lea asked teasingly. “You got any admirers?”

“Not really,” shrugged the younger girl. “I went to the all-girls part of RG Prep, so I never had much chance to meet guys. There was one who went to the boys' school, he would always tease me when Iris and I were walking home. He was cute but...”

“Sounds to me like he liked ya!” the redhead grinned. “Isa and me went to RG Prep too and we always used to tease girls we liked.”

“Correction!” Isa cut in. “You used to tease girls, and I would watch them own your stupid butt and laugh at you later!”

“HEY!”

They all laughed. This outing was proving to be more fun than Kalai wanted it to be. Thankfully there was a ring of her gummiphone at that moment. Lea and Isa’s phones were ringing as well. The redhead answered his first; it was Ienzo.

“Hello, Lea,” He said. “I...hate to break up whatever you guys are doing, but...we’ve begun going through Even’s notes on Namine, and we could use a hand.” 

“No worries,” Lea replied. “We’ll be back in a jiffy. And it’ll give Kalai more time to spend with her sis.”

“Putting off training again?!” The brunette made a face at the two men, but she knew that this time it couldn’t be helped. After all, she was really looking forward to Namine's return as well. Lea and Isa got up and made their way back to the castle.

“Both are important,” said Isa. “This shouldn’t be long. And when you two return, we can begin. How about that?”

“Fair enough, I suppose.” She finished her ice cream and glanced down at her sister with a look a little slightly softer than before. “Is there anything you want to do?”

~~~

They decided to stop by the Moogle Shop since Kalai still needed healing items for training later. When they got there, the Moogle watching the shop informed them that Miss Daphne had just left to go to the castle to make a delivery, or so she said. The older girl grinned and suppressed a snicker.

“What is it?” asked Adelen.

“Nothing. It’s just that, remember before when were talking about people who have our hearts?”

“Your point?”

“Well, Aeleus, he…” Giggling a little, she said, “he has Miss Daphne’s heart. She has his too but they won’t admit it.”

“Oh! So they’re like Iris and Ienzo!”

“Exactly! Actually, can I tell you a secret?”

Kalai did not know at what point her defenses had been lowered. Or when she had begun to not feel so irritated with being out when all she wanted was to train. But it didn’t matter that much to her anymore. At least not at the moment. Adelen grinned at her older sister.

“Sure!”

“It’s my hope to get them together by the time of the New Years ball!”

“Oh!” 

“What’s this about getting Daphne with your guard friend, kupo?” The Moogle floated around them excitedly. “I wanna help! They’re always making puppy dog eyes at each other, kupo! It’s disgusting how neither of them will admit it, kupo!”

“They’re just shy!” Kalai replied. “And they just need a push in the right direction!”

“Well, count me in, kupo!” If the creature had any other facial expression than one, it would surely also be grinning. “And don’t worry! My lips are sealed, kupo!”

“So are mine!” Adelen replied. 

After leaving the Moogle Shop, they decided to walk in the outer gardens overlooking the sea. Somehow Kalai was not surprised at all to find Aerith tending to the flowers by herself. She seemed to do nothing else when she wasn’t working with the Restoration Committee. 

“And who is this?” Aerith asked, smiling down at Adelen. 

“One of my sisters,” replied the brunette. “She and my other sister are staying at the castle.”

“Really? How nice, funny…” Gazing as the younger girl and back at the older one. “With Dilan, it’s obvious that you’re his daughter, but with her...I...don’t see much of a family resemblance between you two.”

Aerith could hardly be blamed for not understanding what she had said, and the sharp pain it caused in Kalai’s chest. She had not taken after her mother at all when she was born, unlike her other siblings. And she knew that was part of the reason Lord Rowan had such a problem with her. Perhaps if she did not look so much like his dark and suave rival, he might have eventually grown to love her.

“We aren’t twins,” she said, trying her best not to sound bothered. “Should there be a resemblance?”

“I guess you’re right. So, what’s your name?”

“Adelen.”

“That’s a pretty name. I’m Aerith, I take care of the outer gardens.” 

“I love flowers.” The younger girl smiled. “I thought the gardens within the castle walls were pretty, this place…” Looking around her, “...it’s amazing.”

“I should hope so. Our flowers are the pride of The Capital of Light.” 

“Yes,” Kalai agreed. “That many of these plants can be beautiful at all seasons of the year. It’s one of the things I’ve always loved about this place.”

They spent a decent amount of time with Aerith as she watered the many flowers and even began to plant new ones that would bloom in the New Year. It was something they could all bond over. Soon Kalai had forgotten her anxiety entirely and began to regard Adelen with much more kindness than before. But she was not about to forget her training. 

“Are you ready to go back now?” she asked Adelen after about an hour. The younger girl made a face that told her that she was not. “I still have training and I don’t think you can…”

“Adelen can hang out with me a little longer,” Aerith spoke up. “I don’t mind.” 

“Really?” Her face lit up at once. “I mean...if you don’t mind, Adelen. You...know how to get back to the castle when you’re ready, right?”

“I do, I’ll be fine!” 

Adelen had been secretly hoping for a chance like this. Between her lessons with Isa and Iris often busy with Even and Ienzo, she didn’t have much time for fun. Her uncle was adamant that she not leave the castle without one of her sisters or one of the apprentices watching her. Maybe once she was done with Aerith, she could explore the town more. Members of the Restoration Committee were often patrolling the streets; what could go wrong? 

“Very well,” Kalai smiled. “Come back to the castle the moment you’re done here.”

“I will, I promise!” A small lie, but no one need ever know. “Go kick Isa’s butt!”

They laughed, and Kalai made her way back to the castle, going the long way through the reactor so she would not have to explain to her father or Aeleus why her sister was not with her. She may have been able to avoid them but she could not avoid Iris. 

“Where’s Adelen?” she asked. “Lea and Isa came back a while ago and said you two were still out.”

“I’m letting her hang out with a member of the Restoration Committee in the outer gardens. She’s fine.” Kalai replied rather nonchalantly. As far as she was concerned, Adelen was in good hands. 

“Okay. I’ll go get her later, I guess.” 

They were about to pass by each other when at the last moment, Iris spoke up again. 

“I’m sorry about earlier,” she said. “I...really wasn’t trying to step on your toes. I just…”

“Don’t worry about it.” The older girl allowed herself a small smile towards her sister. “I’m...still getting used to the idea that I can interact with any of you without being made to feel…”

“I know. I don’t want you to feel like we’re imposing on your life. I know your happier here than you ever were home. But...”

She did not complete her sentence, and Kalai did not respond, only nodding to Iris as she made her way back to the courtyard. Under her breath, she murmured to herself. 

_Ienzo...I know you’re a good person, I hope you come to love Iris. You deserve happiness with someone who loves you, even if...I can’t have that._

~~~

Two hours later, Adelen was still with Aerith but had begun to become bored. It was still afternoon and she did not want to return just yet. This was the girl’s first time outside Halcyon Province, where she grew up and was only allowed to leave home to go to and from school. She had heard some of Lea’s stories about the world outside her own and she knew that Kalai had visited some of them and she couldn’t help but feel jealous. To the sheltered girl, the Capital of Light was a whole new world. 

“I never imagined the world outside our province would be so much bigger. And amazing,” she said. 

“It wasn’t always this way,” replied Aerith. “But things have gotten a lot better since the darkness was banished from this world.”

“Darkness took our home as well,” Adelen sighed. “It took our father but sometimes I wonder...did the darkness take him or did he…” She paused for a long moment. 

“Adelen?”

“Oh it’s nothing.” 

Or better yet, it was something she did not yet wish to honestly give much thought to. In the next she was making her way back to the entrance of town. 

“Going back home now?”

“Uh, yes I am,” she lied. “They’ll...probably want me back soon.” 

“Okay, it was nice meeting you!”

Adelen waved back to Aerith and returned to town. Looking around the central square, she thought about where she wanted to go next. Upon opening the front gates leading towards the large stairs, she noticed one gate in particular that led down a long pathway into the forest. 

That was where Adelen decided to venture to. The air was earthy and calm as she made her way through a line of tall, aged trees. Even at this time of the year there were many flowers to be seen growing beside the falling leaves. It was all very peaceful but she thought she heard a rustling sound like soft footsteps nearby. 

Soon Adelen realized what was making the sound: a small distance ahead of her was a pretty young doe. She had never seen such a graceful animal up close and decided to tread carefully towards it to have a better look. But as she approached it her foot landed on a brittle twig and the ensuing cracking sound alerted the animal to her presence and it ran away. 

She decided to follow behind it, not realizing she was moving deeper and deeper into the forest. Eventually, she lost track of the doe and soon found herself unsure of where she was or which way she had come. But she could still see the high towers of the castle above the trees, so she reasoned she couldn’t have gone too far. Finally, Adelen came upon something far more interesting than a deer.

There were caverns in the Capital, places that were mined for synthesis materials. She was aware of that. Some even had tunnels that connected under the sea. This must have been one such tunnel. Maybe it led to the purification center. Only one way to find out. 

No. This was not leading to the purification center. But wherever this place was, it was strangely mesmerizing with its bright white walls to one side and marble pillars holding up walls of water on the other. It almost seemed like another part of the castle, maybe it was. Perhaps the door at the end of the long hallway would lead her back to the castle and she wouldn’t have to worry about having to explain her whereabouts to anyone. Only one way to find out. 

It did seem like the computer room, except that the walls were made of water. Adelen approached the computer in the center of the room and touched it curiously. At once it lit up and information quickly flashed before her that she did not understand. 

Large doors emerged from the watery walls, emitting a mysterious blue glow. Thirteen portals each with an emblem. She glanced at the portals almost as if their strange beauty was bewitching her. What if these portals led to other worlds? Lea may have told her about the worlds outside Radiant Garden but he never told her how to get to them. Perhaps this was the way. Only one way to find out. 

~~~

“Come on! Stop holding back!”

“Your father is watching us! He’ll kill me if any harm comes to you!”

“Implying you can actually hurt me!”

Kalai laughed as she jumped out of the way of the claymore, spinning around and striking Isa from behind. 

“You’re not an assassin!” Dilan called out. “Stop attacking from behind!”

Isa took her brief moment of listening to find an opening and struck at her, only to have Kalai raise her weapon to clash with his. She pushed him back and lunged, cutting through his block and making a point of not going for his back when she saw an opening. 

“Better! It’s always better to have your eyes on your opponent, read his reactions to see what his next move may be.”

His words served to encourage her as she finally managed to knock the blue-haired man down and point her lance at him in victory. Dilan nodded in satisfaction. 

“You have improved greatly.”

“Thank you.” She lowered her head modestly and turned to Isa, extending her hand to help him up. “Good fight, thanks for not holding back this time! I’ll never get better if I don’t have a challenge!”

“True, but I think you’re already pretty strong.”

“And I’ll only remain strong if I keep challenging myself!” 

“Well said,” Dilan smiled at his daughter. “You haven’t the slightest idea how much I’m looking forward to your ceremony.”

She returned his smile, warmth rising within her heart. His approval was one of the things she lived for, and to have it was sublime.

There was a sudden vibration in her pocket as her gummiphone rang. Kalai picked it up, and it was Iris. She was with Ienzo, and both seemed distressed. 

“Kalai, do you know if Adelen returned to the castle?” he asked. “We can’t find her, and Iris is getting worried.”

“She’s with Aerith,” she replied rather casually. “She wanted to hang out in the outer gardens but I had training so…”

“That’s the problem,” Iris jumped in. “Aerith said she left about an hour ago and said she was going back to the castle.”

“What’s this?” Dilan raised his eyebrow at his daughter. “Weren’t you supposed to be watching her?”

“She’s fourteen. She’s more than capable…”

“Not the point!” he snapped. “As a prospective member of the Royal Guard, you should know it is your duty to protect and watch over all those who reside in this realm! Let alone one of your own blood!”

His words stung, doubly so since he had just been praising her not even five minutes before. And she felt her animosity towards the brat returning. Despite her feelings, she tried to put on a strong face. 

“We’ll find her,” she said. “I can’t imagine she got far. We’ll find her.”

“You better!” Dilan replied. “She was your responsibility, so her disappearance is also your responsibility!”

 _More like Iris’ responsibility!_ This is what she thought, but she said nothing. 

“Iris, you and Ienzo meet me outside the gates. We’ll figure out things from there.”

~~~

At once, Kalai noticed the side gate leading into the forest was open. Very rarely did anyone venture back there. Apparently, Iris and Ienzo had seen it too. 

“You think she may have wandered into the forest?” asked the younger girl, pointing towards the open gate. 

“It’s the only place we haven’t looked,” she replied, already making her way down the dirt trail. “Let’s go!”

Soon the three found themselves standing at the same door Adelen had found not too long ago. Iris knew she was an adventurous girl, curious about everything around her. Hopefully, this place had not led her to anything dangerous. Down the halls, they went. Kalai gazed up at the familiar-looking white walls and noticed the sick feeling in the young man's face as he was no doubt recalling the exact things she was. Well, maybe not exactly what she was remembering, or better yet, trying not to recall. 

“What the hell is this place?” she murmured.

“This isn’t part of the castle?” her sister asked. 

“No. No place we were ever aware of,” Ienzo replied. “But hopefully…”

His thoughts were cut off as they made their way to the end of the hallway and into the room of watery walls and thirteen portals. Another sick feeling came to both him and Kalai as they silently recalled the emblems on each. They gave each other a look that meant not to say a word to the younger girl about what these emblems represented. The computer in the center flashed data that at once Ienzo was able to decipher. 

“They're...data simulations…” he began. “Here I can check the status of each portal, and...there seems to be activity in this one." he pointed to a diagram of the portals on the screen. Something was happening in the third one on the left from the center.

“That has to be where she is!” Iris exclaimed. “But are they dangerous?”

“Like I said, I never even knew this place existed before now.”

Kalai counted the portals until she came to the one he was referring to, it was now glowing red instead of blue and the emblem was that of a book. The sickness in her stomach continued to rise, but she knew she could not allow Iris go in there. She clutched her lance tightly and turned entirely away from Ienzo. _Damnit Adelen…_

“Only one way to find out,” she said. “I’ll go in and bring her back!”

“Kalai!” 

“Are you sure?” he asked. “What if…”

“Like you said, it’s just a simulation! You two stay out here and find a way to shut it down. I’ll make sure nothing bad has happened!” 

Ienzo glanced at her and noticed she was not meeting his gaze, Iris noticed as well and bit her lip nervously. 

“Okay, please be careful, Sis.”

~~~

With bated breath she jumped into the portal. At once she was transferred to a dark place she had never before seen but resembled a dilapidated floating island. The sky was an eerie and ominous purple and there hiding in a bunch of tall grass was Adelen. Though she was clearly distressed, Kalai was in no mood to have sympathy.

“Adelen!” she hissed. “What did I tell you about going straight back to the…”

“Sshhh!” Adelen whimpered. “Not too loud or it will hear you!”

“What?!” 

“It disappears if it can’t see or hear you!"

“What disappears?” Kalai asked, not noticing the familiar specter beginning to materialize behind her, but Adelen could see it and softly gasped. 

"Get down! Hurry!"

"What is this…” 

Kalai received her answer at the sound of a terrifying, familiar laugh. Her entire body went cold but she forced herself to turn around and face the nightmarish apparition. So stunned was she with fear that all she could do was pull her sister to her quickly, shutting her eyes. Anger could wait. 

“IRIS! CAN YOU HEAR ME?! YOU HAVE TO SHUT IT DOWN NOW!”

“We’re trying!” 

Somehow her voice could still be reached from this place. If this was indeed only a simulation, it was a damn good one. Terror and flashbacks burned through her, but she knew she had to force them from her mind for now. 

“What’s happening?!”

Kalai did not have time to answer her as Adelen’s screams forced her eyes open. Zexion had somehow managed to trap her in a book! And judging by the frightening green aura surrounding him, he was about to do the same to her.

“Sis! I...ahhh...Kalai, help me!”

“Okay! Okay! Uh...lemme see...uh...damn...okay…” 

As she tried to find a way to free her sister, her mind was also focused on not becoming trapped as well. She cast thunder on the book and struck it a few times with her lance, both seemed to work, and soon Adelen reappeared.

“Stay close to me! It can’t get you if…no!!”

Zexion pointed his Lexicon at them again, Kalai managed to cast a protective wind spell at the last moment and then placed a protective barrier over her sister. 

“Don’t move!”

“Don’t worry, I won’t!”

It was becoming clear her only means of defense was offence until Iris and Ienzo could manage to shut it down soon. Pointing her lance at Zexion, she tried swiping the book from his hands to no avail. He continued to cast spells of fireballs and purple flames at her that she barely managed to block. 

Kalai recalled what her father told her during training and forced herself to keep her eyes on his, but looking into them proved extremely difficult. There was malice in those ocean eyes, precisely as it had been during that harrowing last day in Castle Oblivion. It was almost too much. And then she recalled something else Dilan had said before. 

_It’s alright to be afraid, accepting it will make you stronger. But never let your opponent know your fear._

Out of the corner of her eye she could see the barrier protecting Adelen was fading. Zexion noticed too, chuckling sinisterly as he pointed his Lexicon at her once more. 

“NO!!!”

She seized her in a protective embrace, eyes shut as they were both swallowed up by the book. They were immediately transferred to the nightmarish empty grey void she remembered so well. At this point it was all Kalai could do not to become crippled with terror as she double-cast the protective barrier over them, praying it would be enough to combat the flames currently being pelted upon them. 

“Adelen! Promise me now that you will NEVER tell Iris about what was in this portal! Understood?”

“Sis…”

“Promise!”

“I promise!”

_I never thought I’d actually wish to be a Nobody again! At least then maybe we’d stand a chance!_

Gazing up at the apparition, she extended her hand and tried to thunder to free them from the void. It was as if the light of Kingdom Hearts heard her thoughts and was coming to her aid because instead of thunder, Stormborn appeared! 

Kalai didn’t dare question it. She left the barrier and began slashing furiously at Zexion. Adelen watched with a strange sense of awe. Her sister had become a completely different person with her new weapon. Never would she know the significance of it, nor how difficult it was for her to face this apparition even if it was only that.

“Let the Tempests consume you!”

From spear to staff, she summoned a hailstorm that consumed him and banished the void. But before she had a chance to strike again, everything went white, and Zexion disappeared. As did her more powerful weapon.

“We got it!” Iris called out. “There should be another portal behind you two. You can come out now!” 

They turned their direction towards the portal. From where they stood, they could see it led back to where they came. They wasted no time leaving. But not before Kalai made Adelen promise her again never to say a word about what they just experienced to their other sister, lest her affection for Ienzo die.

  
~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another trash headcanon: All of the gummiphones belonging to former Org members have the 13th Struggle as the ringtone.
> 
> Okay, in all seriousness, this one was difficult to write. I feel for Ienzo so badly, even if I as the writer knows what's going to happen, it still hurts! XD


	3. Strength of Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Determined to free her heart from the darkness threatening to overtake her, Kalai prepares to face possibly her greatest challenge yet. Meanwhile it appears that she is not the only one suffering from shadows of their past.

~~~

Iris could tell something terrible had happened without them having to say so. She could see how shaken Adelen was from the ordeal, and she could see how the ordinarily intrepid Kalai seemed almost on the verge of tears.  

"What happened?"

Neither responded. Ienzo tried to put a comforting hand on Kalai's shoulder. She flinched, shielding herself with her arms. 

"No!"

"Kalai…" 

"Don't touch me!"

He could see tears forming in her eyes and knew better than to reach out for her again. He sighed and tried to do the same to Adelen. The younger girl was more forgiving, or at least she was better at pretending. 

"That was...that...was..."

The older girl briefly locked glances with her, hoping she'd remember her promise. But there was no longer terror in her eyes, quite the opposite. 

"That was SO COOL!" She blurred out. "You should have seen how Kalai's lance changed! It got all glowy and purple, and then it turned into a staff and then she summoned hail and...WOW!!! IT WAS SO AMAZING!!!"

"Oh, Adelen!" 

Iris laughed in amusement at her sister's eagerness. Kalai allowed herself to laugh a little too, more so with relief than anything else. But in the next moment, her eyes shifted towards a portal at the far side of the room. Bearing the crest of a scythe. Her expression changed in a way Ienzo noticed acutely. 

"Can we go into another portal?"

"NO!" They all said in unison. 

~~~

Due to the nature of what was discovered, Ienzo was compelled to tell Ansem the Wise and the other apprentices. It was a terrible scene when Kalai and Adelen were sent to his study to be admonished for their actions. Kalai doubly so for neglecting to watch her and enabling the whole horrible mess to happen in the first place.

"How could you have let this happen?! Danger still lurks in every shadow, and yet you decide to thrust your responsibility on someone else! It's not like you to be so careless, so tell us WHAT were you thinking?!"

She said nothing, knowing it would do no good either way, but inside she was screaming. Adelen could see the tempest in her sister's eyes and tried to speak up.

"It was my fault! I lied to Kalai and told her I'd come straight back to the castle!"

"That is beside the point, Adelen!" Dilan replied. "She should not have returned without you, even if you had come straight back, you could have lost your way or any other possibilities. The point is she neglected her responsibility to you." To his daughter. "Kalai, I am extremely disappointed in you." 

Just when she felt as though her heart could not take anymore, this stung possibly worst of all. She clenched her teeth, refusing to let tears fall as her father continued.

"How are we to permit your entry into the Royal Guard if you can't…"

"Oh, no!" Now she couldn't remain silent, nor could she hide her tears any longer. "Please!"

"This won't happen again! Please don't cancel Kalai's entry because of this! I'm sorry!"

"That may be." Said their uncle. "You may be sorry for your actions. But as for Kalai, is she sorry for her own?"

_What actions?! How is it my fault if the brat doesn't know any better?!_

"I am." She replied gravely, trying her best to ignore her own thoughts. "I truly am."

There was nothing more she could say, and she could not bear their harsh words a moment longer. Kalai ran out of the room, but not before casting her sister a look of anger and absolute hatred. Neither man tried to go after her, and Adelen found herself blinking away tears of guilt. 

"It was my fault." She murmured. "Uncle Ansem, please…"

"My dear." He began, raising his palm to silence her. "I am not saying you are not also at fault. But your sister will soon be entrusted with a great amount of responsibility. It will be her duty to protect this castle, this realm, and all who reside in it. And that also means you."

"We have no intention to cancel her appointment." Dilan went on. "But she must understand all the facets of her new role before we can give it to her. Even…" Hesitantly. "Even the ones she may not like."

~~~

Kalai went back to her room, the only place in the entire castle where she felt she was truly free to feel what was in her heart. She knew it was wrong of her to thrust Adelen on someone else. But why did she even have to be here in the first place?! 

Just when things seemed to be going so well for her, just when she felt control of her life finally in her grasp. It would have not have phased her one bit if she had never seen any of her family ever again. Now with them here, Kalai felt just as isolated as she had been for so long. There was no escape from this.

As she felt herself crying into a dreamless slumber, a tall figure stood over her, taking a seat beside her sleeping form. She was still sniffing and trembling a little when a hand ran down her long dark hair, soft enough for her to be subconsciously aware but not enough to wake her. It felt so kind, so comforting, so...familiar. Surely this was only a dream.

_My poor, sweet Rosebud. It's such a horrible situation, isn't it?_

It had to be a dream. But it didn't matter if it was or not. It was real to her. Her eyes opened, and she gazed up into Marluxia's face. His eyes were blue once more, and in them was a look of tenderness and understanding. 

"Please tell me." She whimpered. "Where are you?"

"Where am I?" He chuckled. "Isn't it obvious, Kalai? I'm right here. With you."

Timidly she reached out for his hand and felt vividly as his fingers closed around her own and were brought to his lips. No. This couldn't be a dream. Without a moment's hesitation, Kalai threw herself upon him and wept. His embrace was real, his words were real, and she refused to believe anything different.

"I'm so alone." She sobbed. "And now my dad is angry with me because of them! Why can't they just leave?! "

"Hush." 

A gentle finger was pressed against her lips before they were brought to his own in a soft kiss. Closing her eyes, she sighed and savored the warmth denied from her for so long. No way this could be a dream now. But as Kalai felt her body melt into the kiss, she also felt his form change. 

His embrace became more possessive, and his kiss more forceful. Kalai opened her eyes, and her heart nearly stopped as she found herself looking into a pair of malicious ocean eyes covered slightly by long and messy slate bangs. She pulled her lips away.

"No...:"

"How very nice," Zexion spoke in a mocking tone. "I always knew you would be a good kisser." 

"Asshole!"

Kalai tried to push him away, but he was too strong, pushing her back onto the bed and pressing his lips against hers once more. Her screams were muffled by his tongue, sliding down her own. He pulled back from her with a devilish grin. 

"Still think Iris would want a guy like me?"

"NOT YOU!" 

"Yes, me." He cupped her cheek in a taunting way. "Is Alixka not a part of you as well?"

"Shut up!"

"I think we both know the answer." 

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

A sinister chuckle warped into shrill giggling as the shadow changed form again, this time into an image somehow even more of a torment to her fragile mind than Zexion had been. She turned her face away from the shadow and buried her face in her pillow, sobbing as she felt a hand stroke her hair in a way almost comforting.

"So much sorrow." Kali sighed for once without a shred of malice in her tone. "I understand."

"How could you possibly understand?!"

"Because I am you, Kalai. I feel what you feel. When you are hurt, I am hurt as well."

"Then why won't you leave me be?!"

At once, her gentle expression melted away back into taunting. Kali pulled her body back into her arms, giggling at how her true self tried to struggle against her. 

"If you could only see the look in your eyes when you thought I was your precious Marluxia." 

"Stop it!"

"Your sorrow will only continue to grow. Take it and form it into rage!"

"No!"

Kalai broke free from her embrace and in the next moment, she was gone. But there was no feeling of relief, only fear that she would return. The door-knocking served only to feed her apprehension. 

"Kalai, are you there?"

Poor Ienzo. His timing couldn't have been worse. She did not respond and instead took refuge in her closet, as she always did. The knocking continued, but Kalai made not a single sound, hoping he would leave. Instead, the door opened; she shut her eyes and bit her lip at the sound of his footsteps coming closer to her hiding place. 

"I know you're there." He said. "Please, I...just want to talk. May we?"

Such was the heaviness in her heart that she felt it was about to burst. His tone was so kind, so soft, so concerned. A far cry from the callous Cloaked Schemer. If only they did not share the same voice. If only she could stop seeing his cruel eyes in his. 

"Kalai…please…I just want to..."

"Ienzo, please. I just can't right now."

"But...Kalai..."

_Kalai... it's just me, Ienzo. Please come out of there._

_No, I'm fine here, leave me alone._

_Braig is such an ass! I'm telling Master Ansem..._

_No! It was my fault...just...I want to be alone right now. Please...let me..._

Eyes the color of the ocean could be seen peering into the crack of her hiding place. Tears blinded her as she tried to move further back into the closet. But it was too late. He knew she was there and that she was hiding from him. That she was afraid of him, and that he had no one but himself to blame for it. 

"I'm...sorry." 

He placed his hand on the door, but he knew there was far more than that currently separating them. Something strange could now be heard choking his voice. Was he also crying?

"With all my heart...I hope you will understand one day, just how sorry I truly am." 

"I...I already do..." 

How could she possibly still see Zexion in him and still feel comfortable letting Iris pursue him? And how could she not forgive him? Kalai reached out for his hand but was stopped by a hand, grabbing hers from behind. The soft, sly giggling told her what (or better yet, who) was holding her back without having to turn her head. 

_Stop it! Let me go to him!_

_Are you so sure you want to do that?_

_Of course, I do! Why should he suffer anymore because of what he did as a Nobody?!_

_Oh? So forget about Iris then?_

_SHUT UP!!!_

She tried to pull her hand away, but she felt herself becoming more and more crippled by the sadness in her heart. Eventually, Kalai stopped trying and sat back into her hiding place, wiping away her tears. 

"Stop apologizing, Ienzo." She sighed. "I...just want to be alone right now. Please let me."

The young man also sighed, but he understood. He only wished he could help her. As he stared at the closet door, he involuntarily recalled the look in her eyes as she and Adelen had emerged from the data portal. The terror that flashed in them when he tried to reach out to her, how she was on the verge of tears just from him that alone.

Ienzo had no right to ask anything of Kalai. Not anymore. 

He left her room and walked down the hallway, stopping in his own room. Gazing into his full mirror, Ienzo studied his reflection, but he was not looking at himself, not as he was now.

In the mirror, he saw a frightened young boy gazing up at a white-haired man with a terrifying-looking keyblade. In the mirror, he saw a dark replica choking the life out of him while his redhead companion watched maliciously. Slowly he undid his purple neckerchief and closed his fingers around his neck, regret and fear rolling down his cheeks. 

"Ienzo, what's wrong?"

His attention was turned to his young protege as she stood there with concern etched in her serene face, concern, and other feelings as well. Despite his sorrow, he managed to smile at Iris. 

"It's...nothing." He lied. "I'm just...worried about Kalai."

"I'm worried about her too." She replied, a sharpness coming to her chest that she tried to ignore. "Adelen told me about what our uncle and Dilan said to her. I'm really beginning to wonder if we made the right decision coming here. Maybe... it's too late to expect forgiveness…"

 _Too late to expect forgiveness_. 

Ienzo sighed as he motioned for Iris to take a seat in a chair next to him. The sharpness in her chest melted into a fluttering warmth as he regarded her with sad but kind eyes. 

"How can it be too late for forgiveness." He began. "If you did nothing wrong?"

"I don't know." She replied. "But I know Kalai would probably be happier if we left."

"You really think so?"

He surprised himself by placing his arm around her and pulling her close to him. Why he did so was unknown to him but he found her strangely comforting. There was something very endearing about Iris that somehow made him forget his own sorrow if only for a moment. Even if he did not yet notice her blushing cheeks or fluttering eyes. 

"Iris, do you really believe that there can ever be a time too late for forgiveness? Then, what would be even the point of atonement?" 

"I guess…" Hesitantly. "The point is because we wanted to set things right. I know we can't take away what happened in the past but that doesn't mean the future has to be set in stone!" 

Ienzo smiled at her, smiling despite his own feelings. Of course she was still worthy of forgiveness. Even if he was not. 

"Well, you cannot set things right if you leave." He said. "Tomorrow is a new day. And with that new day, another chance to be better than before. You have to believe that."

Her heart was warmed by his kind words. Though he did not yet realize, she found him endearing as well. 

"I will try to believe it. But can I ask you something?"

"Ask away, Iris."

"Why did you...I mean...you speak about atonement a great deal. And...I just…"

Iris did not understand why a lump was coming into her throat but he understood. 

"What I must atone for is something I don't know yet if I am worthy of forgiveness for."

"I don't believe that!" Iris made a face at Ienzo, similarly to how her older sister would often make faces at him when they were younger. "If Adelen and I are worthy of forgiveness, than so are you! Your kind and sweet and...and…"

_Oh dear! I'm getting ahead of myself! What am I saying?!_

"And?"

"Oh! It's nothing! I just...I'm going to go check on Kalai!" 

She got up quickly, turning her back to him as she covered her reddening cheeks. But not before pausing to say one last thing that was on her mind. 

"I….I know we haven't known each other long and I don't know what you've done in the past but... I've seen enough to know you're also worthy of forgiveness, Ienzo. So...you...YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE THAT TOO!"

~~~

Kalai did not leave her room for the rest of the evening or even her closet. Her only indication of the passage of time was the daylight fading away in her window that eventually gave way to the darkness of night. She remained alone but to her surprise, her shadow did not return. Not that she was complaining. 

Time continued to be a blur and soon enough she fell asleep. It was unknown how much additional time had passed before light flooded the room and footsteps were heard. Iris knew her sister. And she knew where she was without even having to ask. 

"Sis." She called out softly. "Are you awake?"

No response save for a small sound of annoyance. 

"Adelen is really sorry for the mess she made. We both are."

There was a sigh from the closet, and the sound of the door slightly cracking open. But the older girl did not want to leave the comfort of her hiding place just yet. Iris took a seat on her bed. 

_Irissa, have you seen your sister?_

_Which sister? I have three and your carrying one of them._

_Kalai._

_She's in the closet again! Hiding from us!_

_Stupid girl!_

_I was asking Irissa, not you two!_

"The night you left the manor." She began timidly. "I had a bad dream, father was out somewhere so I went to Lucia but she told me to stop being such a crybaby like you. So...I went to your room but...you were gone."

Slowly the door to the closet opened more as Iris went on. 

"I don't know why but...I felt so alone in your empty room. We didn't talk or play much but I always felt like I wanted to know you better. But…"

"You were only five, Iris." Kalai finally spoke up. The first words she had spoken in hours. "How could you possibly…"

"They were mean to me too!" Said Iris. "Do you remember when Lucia stole that Sacred Heart pendant from mother's room?"

"Of course, I do!" snapped her sister, her temper returning at the painful recollection. "You put it in my room to blame me and your father smacked me over the face for it!"

"Only because she told me to! And then later she told mother that I was the one who actually stole it! I wasn't allowed to leave my room for two days! That's when I knew…" 

She sighed, not knowing what more to say but somehow Kalai understood. At last she left the closet and took a seat beside her younger sister.

"The day after mother died, I was going through her things one day and found this portrait. It was locked in a safe on her dresser but I managed to break it. It was of you and her. When father said you wouldn't be coming to the funeral, I decided to…"

Kalai went to her dresser and pulled out the aforementioned portrait. It had been sent to her along with her mother's last letter when she was given the news of her death. Weeks after the fact. When she said nothing else, Iris continued.

"Adelen was so young, but all I really always wanted was an older sister." She said, cautiously placing a hand on her shoulder. "Lucia was my older sister too but she never liked me. She never liked anyone other than herself and our father. But I had another older sister, and she was taken away from me before I had the chance to know her." 

Kalai turned to her, she seemed so unsure and in her eyes she saw Namine. She had wanted someone too and she had tried her best to be that person for her. For the first time since her sisters' arrival, she felt the barriers around her heart beginning to disintegrate, being replaced with understanding if not yet kindness. 

"She's ugly with a terrible temper, unfit to be a lady." She sighed, not knowing where this exposed vulnerability was coming from but finding herself unable to stop. "She may be good with a lance but she's reckless to a fault and has little patience for anything. But most of all, she's completely unsure of herself…"

"That's what our family said about you!" Iris interrupted her. "But what do you think about yourself?"

"I...really don't know anymore…"

She did not say anything else for a while and Iris said nothing in response. Both girls were thinking about many things at the moment. And both were unsure of which thoughts to make known and which to keep hidden. Perhaps they were both lonely, maybe they were both in need of comfort wherever it could be found. But very slowly, the walls between them began to lower. 

"Kalai…" Iris said at last. "What happened with you and Adelen in that data portal? She won't tell me, and... I'm afraid to ask Ienzo." 

Kalai hesitated, she knew it would be a terrible thing to keep the truth from her. But at the same time she feared what her sister would think if she knew the truth of what she and Ienzo had once been. Ienzo was not Zexion; they were as different as night and day, and the one Iris fancied was the day. For the sake of not breaking her heart, she could not know. Not yet anyway, and not from her.

"I would tell you…" She began. "...but...I don't think I really have the right to tell you. If you want to know, you will know. But not now. Not yet." 

"Very well." sighed Iris. "I understand." 

There was another long silence between them before there was yet another knock on the door. It was Adelen, and at once, she began crying again as she sat between Kalai and Iris. 

"I'm sorry I got you in trouble!" She sniffed. "And I'm sorry I lied to you, I just wanted to have some fun!"

"There are other ways to have fun without putting yourself in harm's way!" 

Kalai gave her a stern look, silently reminding her of her promise. But her look quickly softened before melting away altogether, as much as she wanted to remain angry at her, she found she could not find it in her heart to. A small smile came to her face that Adelen returned hesitantly. Iris pointed out the window.

"Hey, look!" 

It was snowing, the first snow of the season. The soft white flakes were falling at a gentle pace that gave the night a sense of calm despite the recent anxiety among them. 

"Aerith was planting new flowers earlier." Said Adelen. "Won't the snow destroy them?"

"Quite the opposite. She used a special kind of magic to protect them. They will all bloom at midnight to welcome the new year radiantly and luminously." 

Her sister smiled as she remembered her first new year's celebration in the castle, holding Dilan's hand as he pointed out the flowers to her, glowing beautifully beside the freshly fallen snow. Kalai had never stayed up past midnight before, but the excitement kept her awake until she found herself dozing off and waking up the next morning in her room with a new doll that she realized later had been a gift from him. She was eleven years old, and it was the first time she had begun to question if more could exist in the world besides cruelty and unfair treatment. And the first time she had wondered how life would have been if such a man could be her father instead. 

That same man arrived sometime later to check up on his daughter. What he found instead was something very endearing, if not a little saddening. Kalai was indeed there, asleep with an arm lazily around Adelen, also sleeping. Iris was sleeping beside them. The animosity between them having temporarily abated. 

Dilan sighed as he gently patted his child's head, as he had often done when she was smaller. Iris and Adelen were honestly decent young ladies who did not deserve such an awful man as a father. If only fate had not been so cruel to him and their mother, he would not have minded at all giving Kalai sisters, and he would have not minded at all having other daughters. 

_Understand, child. My harshness towards you is because I love you. I see the strength in your heart even if you do not see it yourself. You will need every bit of that strength for the duty you will soon be entrusted with._

There was a chill in the air, and Dilan took a blanket from the closet and placed it over them before leaving as quietly as he had come.

 _My beloved Ilise, I have done my best with our sweet Kalai. I swear I shall do my best with your other girls as well._  

~~~

If only she were able to sleep peacefully after finally achieving some sort of understanding with them, no such luck. Visions of her lovers being torn away from her by relentlessly pursuing Heartless and the malicious golden eyes of an elderly man haunted Kalai's dreams. Hot tears slid down her face, forcing her awake. She gazed up at the window and saw that it would still be quite a while until dawn. 

_You'll never see them again._

_Stop it!_

_Turn your sorrow into rage and your rage into darkness!_

_GO AWAY!_

This could not go on like this. There was still darkness in her heart, and that darkness was going to destroy her soon if she did not deal with it. It didn't matter what the past had once been, the future was yet still not decided, and Kalai was determined that it would not be as it had been before. She would take control of her destiny and overcome the darkness. At this point, she felt as though she had no other choice.

Slipping from the bed and wrapping a purple cloak around her shoulders, she tried to leave quietly, but Adelen sensed her absence and opened her eyes.

"Where are you going?"

"To get some air. I won't be long."

"Can I come?"

"No! Stay here." 

"Don't you want company?"

"Not at the moment, listen to me since you didn't earlier!"

Kalai had her with that point and there was nothing she could say in her defense. She yawned and curled back up onto the bed and was soon back to sleep. 

~~~

"Lea! Lea!"

Firmly but gently she knocked on the door of his house, hoping by some miracle he would still be awake at this hour. To her pleasant surprise, he was. 

"Kalai, what is it? Something wrong at the castle?"

"No. I just...need your help with something…"

"Can't it wait until morning?"

"It can't! It has to do with that data center we found! My uncle wants it shut down and sealed off immediately so this can't wait!"

The redhead groaned but grabbed his jacket and let her led him into the forest where it had been found. Snow was still falling and their surroundings had begun to take on a new beauty after being blanketed over by the shimmering whiteness. 

But it was still night. Crunching footsteps in the snow told them they were not alone and from nowhere, several Shadow Heartless appeared. Between her lance and his keyblade, they made easy work of them but Lea turned to her with a look of concerned annoyance.

"You know we hardly ever see them during the day!" He said. "Tell me again why this can't wait until then?"

"I already told you why!" She replied, running ahead of him a little. "Come on! We're almost there anyway!" 

They made their way down the white halls and Lea gazed around with a strange sense of nervousness. But he chuckled. 

"Never thought I'd see these walls again."

"Still got them memorized?" Kalai asked with a smirk.

"I do. I could never forget Castle Oblivion. Trust me I've tried."

"As have I. I've tried to forget everything from the Organization but somehow it still stays with me even now."

"So I'll ask again, WHY are we here?!"

Truthfully, Kalai could not answer that because she did not have a clear answer for herself. But this felt like the only thing to do. She didn't know if what she had in mind would help with her inner darkness but it did seem like the right step forward. 

They gazed at the thirteen portals for a few moments before approaching the computer in the center. Lea couldn't help but steal some extra glances at the entrance bearing the emblem of a spiked chakram. If only this place weren't about to be sealed off forever, that would be a fun way to pass some time. But Kalai's attention was directed to the one in the very center, the one bearing the emblem of a spear crossed with a magic staff. 

"You'll have to stay out here and shut down the computer if anything bad happens." She said. "It's just a simulation, but everything inside feels as real as if it were. I know Isa wouldn't bring me back here, and neither would any of the apprentices."

"So, that's why you dragged me from the comfort of my bed at this hour?" Lea replied. "So you could fight yourself?"

"I don't need to explain my reasoning to you!" She snapped. "Just stay out here and be prepared to shut down the computer if I need you to!"

Without another word she stepped through the center portal. With the sudden change of scenery, a sharp feeling of sickness overtook her as she recalled what this setting meant to her. 

She was now outside the Old Mansion in Twilight Town. The same place where she went on her last mission that was really an ambush. The same place where Xion has assassinated her under the influence of Saix. But afterward, she was finally given the truth about Nobodies as well as a second chance at humanity. The data materialized before her but did not move for several moments. Kalai pointed her lance at Alixka. 

"You. You represent all of my darkness. My bondage under Xehanort." She said to the apparition. "You represent my past and all that I'm trying to erase. That horrible shadow that keeps tormenting me, it's you."

Alixka did not respond or even blink, as if she could not compute the idea of fighting a foe that was the spitting image of herself save for the clothing. 

"What are you waiting for?!" She snapped. "Are you afraid? Raise your weapon and fight me!"

"Beautiful, isn't she?"

Kali appeared beside Alixka, stroking her hair affectionately as she regarded Kalai with a sinister smile. 

"I'd say she's you at your strongest. Wouldn't you agree?"

"No! Alixka was impulsive and weak. Always picking fights she couldn't win and getting herself into situations she couldn't handle!"

"Maiden of Tempests, am I right? Beauty and fury, serenity and…"

"Shut up!"

"But some good did come from it did it not? You met Marluxia and Larxene."

The shadow did have a point, loath as Kalai was to admit it.  But she kept her lance pointed at the two dark images.

"Kalai." She went on. "I know you're afraid of me. Why I haven't the slightest clue. But I know you understand the power of darkness, and what brings forth your own is not to be taken lightly." Kali pulled away from Alixka and approached her true form slowly.

"You felt alone and unloved in the home of your stepfather. You were afraid and unsure as a Nobody, and just when you felt like you had found purpose and understanding in that existence, it was torn away from you, and you were alone again. But then you were given another chance at humanity, just to have it torn away from you and with it, your love for Marluxia and Larxene. From that, Alixka's power was cultivated. From all of that, I was born."

Kalai had always made a point of not staring directly into her golden eyes, but now as she spoke, she felt that she could not help but do so. In her eyes, she saw herself, she saw the deepest darkest emotions she kept hidden away in the deepest corners of her heart. Hidden away even from herself. 

To see all those feelings being revealed to her like this, it was more frightening than she could ever imagine. Kali was her; she was the version of herself she always knew was there. The darkness of her childhood closet comforting her while she cried herself to sleep. The sick rush of adrenaline as she used her volatile limit break to just narrowly escape being swallowed by a Demon Tower, nearly killing herself in the process. Her lust for control as she pressed her lips against those of Xehanort's. Kali was all of those things. 

But she was still darkness, and she was now preventing her from moving forward in her life. The future was not yet decided, who said it had to be darkness? Who said that the light of the future couldn't now be her destiny?

"Just think of how much more we could accomplish if you'd embrace the darkness."

"What do you mean 'we'?" The shadow scoffed at this.

"Fine. Clearly you need more convincing than I thought." And with that, Kali passed through Alixka, awakening something in the apparition that had before that moment remained still as a statue. Her violet eyes, once blank, flashed with malice as Stormborn appeared in her hand. She giggled before lunging at Kalai. Weapons clashed, she had forgotten just how quick she was. 

"I will banish the darkness in me!" She snapped. "Starting with you!"

Alixka giggled again, a shrill and coquettish sound, as she blocked her attacks. From nowhere, a strong gust of wind pushed Kalai back, another thing she had forgotten. She watched as the apparition crossed her arms to summon more wind, so she decided to do the same. But the wind canceled each other out, something Alixka seemed to find quite amusing. She opened her arms and summoned four silver cyclones that Kalai managed to freeze before they struck her. In response, she summoned thunder that Alixka blocked before manipulating it back to her direction. 

_Yeah, thunder was never really my strongest skill. At least not as a human._

Fire worked better, but it soon became apparent that her magic was no match for her Nobody's and physical combat would be better, so long as she didn't transform her spear into a staff. For a time, they only slashed at each other before Alixka vanished in a cloud of purple, reappearing behind her. Kalai suppressed a small laugh. Marluxia had taught her that ability. She cast more fire before Alixka pointed her weapon at her and summoned a hailstorm, a shield of wind protected her from it though and she soon found their weapons clashing again. A violent gale pushed Kalai back. 

"Looks like our daddy taught you well, Alixka." She grinned, slashing at her once more. The apparition smirked as she created several purple vortexes with her spear that cut through the attacks. Another gale was summoned before Kalai could lunge back at her. Their eyes met for a brief moment.

"He did indeed. But just think of what more _I_ could teach you, Kalai." 

"HUH?!" 

Zexion's apparition had not spoken a word, and she had figured that none of the data simulations could since they were just that. Data. So to hear Alixka speak was more than a little alarming. But before she could say anything more, she saw as Kali's form exited from the apparition and leaped towards her. Her sly grin was the last thing Kalai saw before she passed through her body, and her surrounding went white again. What had just happened?!

She collapsed, her mind trying to comprehend what had just happened. Kali's laughter rang in her ears.

_I will show you Kalai, I will show you just how powerful your darkness is. You will see for yourself what you are capable of. Mark my words._

"Hey, Princess! You still alive in there?!"

Awoken by Lea's words, Kalai rushed out of the portal. This may not have been the best idea after all, but at least now she understood. The darkness in her heart would not be destroyed so easily. Perhaps it was now time for some intervention from an outside source. These were her thoughts as she and Lea left The Garden of Assemblage for the last time and made their way back to the castle.

~~~

 

_Kalai's Journal Entry ~ What is Real_

_How I was able to sleep at all last night is both a mystery and a miracle. Yesterday was horrible. If losing Adelen wasn't bad enough, where we found her was even worse! Dad and my uncle are furious with me for losing her in the first place, I haven't seen either of them since._

_I don't want to leave my room, I don't want to leave this castle for anything. I just want to be alone, but even alone, I am tormented. That terrible shadow keeps coming to me, I'm beginning to wonder if she is truly real after all and not just a nightmarish hallucination._

_This can't go on. If the darkness in my heart won't fade on its own, I'll force it out in the only way I know how._

 

_~~~_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another trash headcanon: The Garden of Assemblage is an area that was used by Xehanort as a way to replicate the data/powers of the Organization in one of his many attempts to create Thirteen Darknesses, the only real difference being that instead of a data portal for Xemnas, there’s a portal for Alixka instead and the project (along with other projects involving replicas) was abandoned with Vexen’s demise. Alixka’s portal is in the center, replacing Xemnas’. 
> 
> Also, who wants to bet that if Ansem the Wise didn’t order it sealed off right away, that Lea would go back there to challenge his own data battle? Of course he would, he just seems like that kind of guy to me. 
> 
> And I swear to God the angst shall let up in the next few chapters.


	4. Into the Open Air

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something of a fluffy reprieve before shit begins to hit the fan again in the next chapter. Well, not completely fluffy.

~~~

The men gaped at her for a few moments, did she really just ask what they thought she had? Apparently so. But why? Why would Kalai wish to go through such an ordeal for a second time? Especially since it was no longer necessary? Even tried to form his argument against it but found he was oddly at a loss for words. 

"My Lady…" he began. "...do you really think…"

"Yes." She somehow knew what he was about to ask without having to hear it. Her mind was made up. "I'm certain. You once said the darkness in my heart is in a dormant state. Well... I'm not so sure. And with the ceremony so soon now I…"

"My Dear, if this is still about what happened with Adelen," Her uncle spoke up. "Please, that was weeks ago. We are no longer angry with you, so don't…"

"This is about more than that." Her head lowered some with a strange sense of shame. "You said yourself, my heart needs to be strong and not waver for what is to be expected of me. I'm...not so sure how strong my heart truly is, not anymore."

Ansem The Wise gazed at his niece thoughtfully. It was still difficult for him to believe that this sincere young woman had ever been a member of Organization XIII. But he had also noticed how she had become gradually more melancholic in the past weeks. How some days, she would deliberately avoid Ienzo and now preferred to stay in her room as opposed to going into town as she had often loved to. Perhaps she was correct. Who else knew Kalai's heart better than Kalai herself? He gave her a kind smile.

"Very well then, Kalai." He said. "We shall try the darkness extraction one more time."

~~~

Naturally, Dilan wanted to be present and stood outside of the computer room nervously as Even and Ansem prepared the computer. Iris did not know what was happening and passed by, wondering what everyone was now doing since she had not seen anyone that morning. She stole a glance at Even strapping her sister down to a stretcher and glanced up at Dilan nervously.

"What are they…"

"No need to be concerned." He quickly replied, hoping his voice did not betray his feelings. "Just a procedure looking into....the essence of her heart."

"Oh?" 

When she took another glance at Kalai, their eyes met for a brief second. There was a kind look in her eyes that put her at ease, 

"May I stand in on it then? Since I'm also a Student of the Heart, would it be possible if…"

"No!" Kalai spoke up. "I mean, no, I don't think…"

"What your sister means…" Even cut in. "Is that this is something...we really don't feel comfortable with you witnessing just yet. What we're about to do...it may appear alarming to one not aware of what's happening." 

Iris made a face at Even and was about to leave when Ienzo entered the room. They had become closer in the weeks that followed after the incident in the Garden of Assemblage. While he had become very fond of her, he was still unsure about the depth of her feelings. But unbeknownst to him, they were probably just as deep as his own, and she was not about to pass up a chance to be beside him. Kalai could sense what her sister was thinking and swallowed her own apprehension. 

"Even...if Iris doesn't mind being here, I don't mind either." Laughing a little." Not like I'm gonna be aware of anything anyway."

The scientist smiled a little, she was correct. They had plans to sedate her for this attempt since there was no urgency as there had been before. He nodded at Iris, allowing her to come into the room, before turning to Ienzo.

"Place the patches over her chest, like I did the last time. Iris can…"

"Let Iris do that!" She squeaked, perhaps a little too quickly. Considering the content of her more recent nightmares, she was yet unsure if she was ready to allow the young man to come anywhere near her. He understood. 

"Here, Iris, I'll show you. And after that, you can administer the sedative."

Cautiously, Iris took the patches from Ienzo and placed them where he pointed. When they were just so, she gave Kalai an injection of a strange cyan liquid that quickly put her into a deep slumber. But it was not lost on her how her sister would not look at him. She glanced at him nervously.

"Was that good?" 

"Yes." He smiled. "And now you can watch her, she'll likely not feel anything but…"

"What do you mean 'likely'?!"

"Uh...well...the heart is a very vital part of who we are, Iris. Who knows what we may find once we examine hers." 

Ienzo tried to sound sure but truthfully, he was probably just as concerned for Kalai as her sister was. He felt as though he was partially responsible for the darkness currently plaguing her. It was his hope this would help in their reconciliation in addition to bringing her peace. 

Their master started up the computer, immediately Kalai's form arched up in her sleep. Iris glanced up at Ienzo, but he gave her a look that meant not to be concerned. Though it did little to ease her nerves. Ansem and Even went through the data being gathered and shook their heads.

"How odd, Kalai says she believes her darkness is no longer dormant, but from what we see here...wait!" 

Something popped up on the computer that made Even jump slightly in his seat. In response, Ansem scanned several wires connected to her, pressing buttons quickly as he tried to decipher what was happening.

"Uncle…"

"It's alright, my dear," He regarded his niece with a little smile. "We didn't see it until just now, but there is a powerful darkness pulling at your sister's heart."

"Uncle Ansem!"

"Can we do anything about it?" Ienzo asked, his tone betraying now the concern he also felt. 

"She appears to be trying to do just that." Was the answer. "Her heart is trying to break free, let's see if we can give her a hand."

He scanned a few more wires, and then motioned for Iris to connect another one to Kalai. As she approached her, she could see the pain twisting in her face and could hear her low groans. She sighed. 

_Oh Kalai, what is happening to you? Where is this darkness coming from?_

This went on for nearly two hours. Iris watched her sister's responses and Ienzo looked over the data with Even and Ansem. The computer suddenly began flashing red and making an alarming noise that was not heard the first time they had tried this. They watched as Kalai's body began to writhe and she cried out, beginning to awaken from her sleep. Even motioned for his two wards to hold her down before turning back to the computer. He gave his master a knowing look, and they both nodded. 

"As I suspected." He said. "This won't work without doing other...irreversible damage...to her heart. I do not feel comfortable continuing without her knowledge of what could happen."

Ienzo made quick work of removing the wires from her while Iris continued to hold her. After a few moments, she finally woke, gasping out for air and with tears streaming quickly down her face. 

"Iris!" She sobbed. "Iris! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" 

"Sorry? For what?" 

"Please forgive me!"

"I don't understand!"

There was no explanation, only continued sobbing as her younger sister tried to console her. Ienzo watched them with a sick feeling of hopelessness.

"This can't go on!" She continued. "Something must be done about that...THING!"

"My Dear…" Ansem finally spoke up. "We tried our best. Unfortunately, we cannot strip the darkness away from you completely."

"WHY NOT?!"

"Because…" Even replied. "There is darkness in nearly every heart. If we were to try again, we could cause great damage to you. Your heart would become fractured, or worse, your memory could be erased and those whose hearts are connected to yours...they…" Sighing despondently. "They will never be able to find you." 

The scientist gave Ienzo and Iris a certain look, the young man understood and gently pulled Iris out into the hallway where Dilan was waiting. Once they were gone, he brought a chair to the computer and gently guided Kalai to it. He pointed to the screen to show her.

"When we attempted to extract Xehanort's essence from you," He began. "We were ultimately unsuccessful because at that very moment, someone's heart was connecting to your own. If we had continued, the connection could have been lost forever. Later, before you and I recompleted, your uncle and I went over the data we gathered and saw that another's heart had joined with yours. I'm sure...I don't need to tell you who they were."

A soft tint arose on Kalai's tear-streaked face and she smiled a little in spite of herself. In her mind she was replaying the moment where they both said that they loved her. Somehow that fact made the knowledge of their fading even more painful than the first time. She placed her hand upon her heart in a bittersweet gesture. 

"Marluxia…" She murmured. "...and...Larxene…: 

"My Dear…" continued Ansem. "There is darkness in nearly every heart. But having a heart at all takes incredible strength and even more so to withstand darkness and not let it overtake you." He took his niece's hands into his own. "You are strong, Kalai. And you must remain strong. There are so many people rooting for you. Your father, your sisters, your friends, and I'm sure wherever _they_ are, they are rooting for you as well and are trying to return to you. For their sake you have to stay strong. If you do, I am certain there will be no darkness will be a match for you."

Kalai was not so sure, not at that moment anyway. Not after what she had just seen. But for the sake of her uncle, and everyone she knew were counting on her, she smiled.

"I will do my best, Uncle Ansem." She said. "I promise."

~~~

The day past with Kalai returning to her room and not leaving anymore, she did her best to not think about her feelings or the shadow still tormenting her. But something that she had seen while sedated made her feel even worse than before, if such a thing was possible. Kali had told her she would show Kalai what she was capable of if she let the darkness overtake her. But if she was capable of such a thing as she had shown her, Kalai could not help but feel even more afraid of her darkness now than she had ever been. 

Almost on instinct, she shifted her attention to a small golden bangle circling her wrist. It was something Kalai always wore and never removed, it was a gift Marluxia had given her when she had been in the Organization for three months. It had confused and embarrassed her at the time, but now looking at it, she couldn't help but wish to return to that time, when they were all together. No. That was the past and the future was yet to be determined. She had to be strong, there was really no other choice. 

_Please come back to me, you two! I'm trying to be strong but it's so hard! Where are you?!_

The following day, she was supposed to resume training. But her father, seeing clearly how dejected she was feeling, decided to let Kalai skip training for the day and suggested she go with Isa and Adelen into town. They had gone to pick out a new gown for the New Years ball.

"Something in my heart tells me that he will not be of much assistance to her." He said. "This is really a venture meant for two young girls. Two sisters."

Dilan was correct on that matter, but beyond that he secretly hoped that going out would help lift his daughter's spirits. Kalai did not bother to object, and very slowly, her mood began to turn. With Christmas and the New Year now so near and with the newly fallen snow, there was a sense of joy in the air that could not help but begin to creep into her heart as she and her sister looked over several dresses while the blue-haired man stood behind them, trying to seem interested. 

"Isa, if you were a girl, which would you pick?" Asked the younger girl as she held up two dresses, one pink, the other green. He blushed.

"Uh...I'm not really the most fashion-savvy, maybe…" Turning to Kalai. "...your sister could give you better advice than I could."

The older girl couldn't help but grin as she looked over the two dresses. Somehow, green did not seem to be a color that suited Adelen. 

"The pink one. But try it on to be sure." 

She did so and at once Kalai knew she had made the right decision. Adelen looked quite pretty and very grown-up. There was a subtle glow in her cheeks as they both silently agreed that they had found the perfect gown for her.

As she stood in a nearby mirror admiring herself, something in the mirror caught her eye that made her laugh softly. Kalai noticed the same thing and leaned into her sister to whisper. 

"There's Miss Daphne." She said. "Looks like she got the invitation we sent."

Adelen nodded; one of the few things Kalai had left the castle for in the past weeks was to leave an invitation to the New Years' ball at the Moogle Shop. An invitation for their shop assistant. Now there was no reason she couldn't be there. They turned to her and smiled, pretending to have just seen her. 

"Oh! We didn't think to see you here!" Smiled Adelen. "And here we thought to go to the Moogle Shop after this and pay you a visit!"

Miss Daphne gave them a kind smile as she held up two dresses she was considering. 

"Your Uncle sent me an invitation to the ball, the Moogles are adamant that I go so here I am."

"Well _we_ are adamant you go too!" Kalai replied. "We're actually here picking out a gown for my sis."

"Same. I'm trying to decide between these two."

Kalai looked at the two dresses but wasn't at the same time. Her attention was directed to another dress on display behind her, she pointed to it and grinned. 

"Try that one." She said. "I think that one would suit you very well. Try it on."

A gown of ice blue with a lacy yoke neck in the same color. The tiny crystals and pearls scattered throughout the bodice and skirt gave her the impression of snowflakes. But more importantly, it was blue, Aeleus' favorite color. Of course, the wearer didn't know this but it didn't matter, she was in love with the dress. 

"This is beautiful!" The blonde exclaimed, turning about in a girlish sort of way. "But 6000 munny...a little out of my budget if…"

"Oh no! Don't worry about it!" Adelen spoke up. "We'll give you the difference! Please get it! It's so pretty on you! You look like a snow princess!"

"What?!" Grey eyes widened and blush rose to her cheeks. "Are you...sure it's alright?"

"Of course!" Kalai chimed in. "Consider it a Christmas present from us to you! I'm so glad you're coming to the ball!"

Miss Daphne still felt a tad bit uncomfortable accepting such a fantastic present. But at the same time, she loved the ice blue gown and how it made her feel. In her mind, she imagined herself in the beautifully illuminated great hall of Lord Ansem's castle, holding the hands of the redheaded guardsman as he guided her across the ballroom floor. At once, she bit her tongue, refusing to give the fantasy anymore room in her heart. Not yet. 

~~~

And so the dresses were paid for. Before parting with them, Miss Daphne expressed her gratitude to Kalai and Adelen over and over. When she was out of sight, the sisters broke out into a fit of giggling while Isa watched them with a raised eyebrow. 

"What just happened?" He asked them as they made their way back to the castle. 

"Oh nothing!" Adelen replied. 

"As if I believe that!"

"It's really nothing!" Kalai grinned. "Just that...Aeleus really likes that woman and she likes him. I'm the one who sent her the invitation to…"

"You sly little siren!" He couldn't help but laugh some. "He had mentioned someone by that name a few days ago. So you two are playing Cupid for them?"

"It's not our fault they are too shy to admit their feelings!" Retorted Adelen. "Just like Iris and Ienzo! We're gonna do the same for them!"

"Damnit Adelen! That was supposed to be a secret!" Isa laughed again, even harder than before. 

"What? You don't think I notice how your sister looks at him? I do, the other apprentices do, everyone does except Ienzo himself!"

They all laughed as they passed the entryway towards the Fountain Court. Out of the corner of her eye, Kalai noticed what she thought was Iris. It was Iris, and she was making her way In that direction. She nudged Adelen and turned to Isa. 

"Hey, we are going to hang out at the Fountain Court for a while." She said. "Go on back to the castle and tell dad where we are if he asks."

He nodded, and then they were off behind her sister. They found her standing on frozen fountain, waving her hands around and appeared to be forming something from ice. Even had recently been teaching ice magic to her, and she had shown great potential. Iris was using her newly acquired abilities to make something. 

After watching her for a few moments without letting themselves become known, they realized that she was making. It was an ice sculpture. Of what? That they could not yet determined. 

"What ya making, Sis?" Adelen asked, to which Iris jumped a little at her sudden voice. 

"Don't scare me like that!" Iris sharply replied. "And I'm not making anything. I'm just…"

Her voice trailed off, and she turned her face back to what she was doing. Adelen moved closer to her and was able to make out the face of someone in the ice, someone she knew. She turned back to Kalai with a teasing grin.

"Ienzo!" She laughed. "She's making an ice sculpture of Ienzo!"

"Adelen!"

"What? No way, let me see!"

Kalai stepped onto the ice with her sisters and got her first glance at the sculpture. It was definitely Ienzo, and it was a perfect likeness to her mind. If there was any doubt in her mind about it, she had only to look at Iris' blushing cheeks for proof. 

"It's very nice. Perhaps…" Smirking, "...we should show it to him?"

"WHAT?! NO!" Iris opened her arms to wrap her arms around her work protectively. "DON'T YOU DARE!"

"Why, Sis?" Adelen tried to pull her away, taking care to watch her footing on the ice. "Don't you think he'd like it? I'm sure he'd be very flattered!"

"No! No!"

"You know, Iris." Kalai continued. "Ienzo is our uncle's heir. One day he will be the ruler of this kingdom. So...if you marry him…"

"SHUT UP!" 

"If she marries him, then Iris will be queen!" 

Their words must have made Iris let her guard down because in the next moment, Adelen succeeded in yanking her away while Kalai held the hand of the sculpture, fluttering her eyes in an exaggerated expression of love. Both of them ignoring how their sister's expression was slowly turning from embarrassment to irritation. 

"Oh yes, Ienzo! I would love to marry you!"

"Queen Irissa!"

"THAT'S ENOUGH YOU TWO!" 

From her hands, Iris summoned two balls of snow that hit them square in the face. Adelen fell back in the snow behind her but continued to giggle. 

"What? Are you saying you don't want to be queen?"

In response, Iris gave chase to her. She was trying to throw more snow at her but Kalai summoned a protective gale around the younger girl. Iris noticed this and began flinging snow at her as well, only to have it thrown back at her. Adelen took this opportunity to run back towards town but she would not get off the hook so easily. 

"I didn't forget about you!"

In the next moment, Adelen found herself running into a wall of snow. Kalai couldn't help but laugh and paid for it with a ball of snow in her face. Soon all three of them were laughing, running back to the castle all while throwing snow at each other. When they reached the front doors, Ienzo was standing there, chatting with Aeleus when Kalai and Adelen stopped with Iris behind them. Not noticing anything except how badly she wanted them to pay for the current fluttering in her chest.

"Finally! I got you two!"

Without another word she flung one last heap of snow at the two, but it did not reach its desired target. Kalai and Adelen dodged the snow and it instead hit Ienzo. They gasped but he did not seem bothered one bit. He laughed a little and approached the redhead with a good-natured smile, before deciding to throw a snowball at her in return. She tried to form her voice into an apology but found her voice was gone, even as he continued to smile.

"Well. I think Even will be pleased with how your magic is improving." 

Blush shot up her face, and she still found herself at a loss for words as he continued. 

"I know you've just returned, but I need to pay a visit to the Moogle Shop and could use your input on some items I need. Care to join me, Iris?"

At once, she nodded in agreement. The cold weather did not matter to her one bit if it meant she could spend some time alone with her handsome mentor. Her sisters looked at each other knowingly as they made their way back into the castle.

"See ya later, Sis!" Kalai said, smiling at them. "And Ienzo, you two may want to make a quick stop by the Fountain Court later!" 

She did not wait for her sister's embarrassed response and pulled Adelen into the castle, both of them laughing softly to themselves. 

"Well, that was fun!" Said the younger girl. "But now we have to get Miss Daphne…"

"Shush!" 

The older girl placed both her hands over Adelen's lips. She nodded to the door, mere feet away from them slightly ajar. Aeleus was still outside. After exchanging looks, they silently agreed with each other to continue their schemes in matchmaking later. 

~~~

Returning to her room, Kalai felt a strange sense of feeling renewed. True there was still apprehension in her heart but she did not feel it as strongly as usual. It was almost as though her strength was allowing the light to return to her. Normally she would be slightly on edge with the fear that the shadow would come to her now that she was alone. 

But she did not. Glancing at her bangle, Kalai smiled, resolved more than ever now to push the darkness away. In her mind she knew that by keeping the light in her heart, that light would become a beacon and bring her lovers back to her. 

_I'll never forget you two, so please don't forget me. I'm going to keep being strong until we are all together again. Why should Aeleus and Ienzo get all the love?_

She sat on her bed, beside her was a parchment paper that was not there before. On it was written the oath Kalai would have to take during her proclamation. Picking it up, she recited it out loud, timidly at first but then with more determination as her mind quickly memorized the words. In the first line, she was to give the name of her father and mother. As she spoke their names, together in a sentence aloud for the first time, a flush came to her cheeks. If only her mother could be here.

Dilan watched her for a few minutes as she recited the oath, his heart swelling with pride. In his mind he recalled the day many years ago when he caught his daughter playing with his lance. He had been angry, but only out of concern for her safety, secretly it tickled him that even at such a young age she had shown interest in it. And then a few years later when she asked about becoming a guard, he felt as though he had secretly been hoping for this moment for as long as she had been alive. Now it was almost here. Gently, he knocked on the open door.

"Be sure to keep your head up; otherwise it will be difficult to hear you." 

Kalai turned to smile at her father and made room for him to sit beside her. He took the parchment from her and began to recite the oath himself. She noticed that Dilan was quoting it from his point of view, giving the name of his own parents.

"Tarian...and Anila…" She began. "They're my grandparents?"

"Yes, child. My own parents. Your grandfather passed on sometime ago but your grandmother, she's still alive. She lives in the Caelesti province." 

"I want to meet her! I don't think I ever have."

"You will. Your uncle has invited her to spend a few days with us in the New Year." 

"With so many people watching me, I hope...I hope I don't mess up." 

"Nonsense." He laughed a little and placed an arm around her. "I know I've said this a hundred and one times but I shall say it for a hundred and second time. I am greatly looking forward to that night. You will be splendid and we will all be so proud of you."

Later that night, Kalai sat up in her bed, not yet able to sleep but not because of nightmares. Her mind was so aswarm with thoughts that she felt unable to calm it even for a moment. Christmas was now two days away and the New Years celebrations eight days away. Butterflies fluttered wildly in her stomach as she thought about it, but for once they were of the right kind. She had even somehow managed to develop a tolerance for her sisters in the castle. The more she began to think about the good things coming, the calmer she felt. Maybe tonight she could finally sleep peacefully.

~~~

No. Nothing could ever be that simple because a few hours later Kalai found herself bolting awake in a cold sweat. The result of yet another nightmare. The same one that had tormented her while Even and Ansem worked on extracting the darkness from her heart. Shrill laughter rang in her ears and she covered them with her hands in a futile attempt to block it.

"WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?!" She screamed. "WHY would you show me that a second time?! WHY did you show it to me at all?!"

Kali appeared before her at once, gazing at her true form with the same malice she always did. She pulled Kalai's hands away from her ears and leaned into her in a way that made her feel profoundly sick.

"I told you, did I not? That I would show you what your darkness is capable of. And what you are capable of once you accept it. What? Not satisfied? I thought you..."

"No, I'm not satisfied!" She spat out. "Why would I be? Why would I be happy being a…"

"Is it because the result was that you now have to deal with your sisters living here?"

"No! That doesn't matter! Darkness cannot drive away darkness! Why would you do such a thing in my name? Why would you…"

"I told you before, Kalai. I am you. Anything I do, I do it because you would do the same thing anyway."

"NO! I WOULDN'T!" 

Kalai pounced on Kali, but she seemed to find this amusing. She giggled as they fought, and she pinned her true self down above her, the way she fought back was very appealing indeed. 

"Come now." She said, raising an eyebrow. "You can't possibly tell me honestly that you've never thought of it. Especially after what happened to your mother?"

"NO! I mean...yes...but...no! It doesn't matter! What was achieved in the end? Nothing! What did it solve? Nothing!"

"See? Your darkness is compelling. And now, just think…"

"I'M THROUGH WITH YOU!"

Her hands descended upon the shadow's neck and at once she vanished, but her laughter continued to echo for several minutes before it finally stopped. Tears streamed down her face as guilt and sadness overtook her.

"LAUGH WHILE YOU CAN! I WILL RID MYSELF OF YOU!"

She spoke with far more confidence than she felt in that moment. No. She could never truly be happy for long.

She did not know why she made her way towards Iris' room, it wasn't like she could tell her what her nightmare had been. But she knocked on her door nonetheless. Fortunately, the younger girl was still awake, apparently studying. 

"Sorry for bothering you," Kalai said.

"You're not bothering me." Iris smiled. "Is something the matter."

"I...I don't really know, but I just...I just wanted to say…" Shutting her eyes tightly before more tears could form. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything!"

"Kalai…" 

Iris gazed at her sister with confusion mixed with sympathy, taking her hands into her own but continuing to smile. 

"You said the same thing yesterday after you woke up." She began. "But why? What are you sorry for?" 

There was a long pause between them before Kalai finally spoke again.

"I'm sorry because...of what you and Adelen went through with those monsters." This was only half of the truth, but it was as much as she felt she could say to her sister without seeming like even more of a horrid person than she already did. "And I'm sorry I wasn't more understanding to you when you first arrived here. I…"

"No need to apologize, Sis. I understand. You have every right to feel what you feel in regards to our family. But Adelen and me, we don't want to be like them."

"I know…"

The smallest of smiles came to her face and in the next moment they were in an embrace, their first one truly as sisters. 

~~~

_Kalai's Nightmare_

_Up in the night sky, a red glowing orb hung ominously, consuming everything surrounding it. But darkness had long consumed this place before the fall of Radiant Garden, even if it could not be seen._

_Screams of terror echoed throughout the halls as people ran about trying to protect themselves from the dark monsters relentlessly persuing everything in their path. She watched them maliciously but her vicious yellow gaze was set on one person in particular._

_"Daddy! Daddy! What's happening?!"_

_"I don't know! Stay close to me, my darlings!"_

_He opened his arms to his children in a protective position that stung her to see it. Always so kind and loving to his own but never did he seem to have any love left in his heart for her. Honestly, he probably didn't have much love in his heart for his late wife either._

_Darkness had long consumed this place, with or without Heartless. And this is where her own darkness began._

_She approached them, laughing a little at how the young man jumped in front of his father and sisters, determined to protect them. But without a weapon or any skills whatsoever besides pretentiousness, he was effectively useless. A sharp blow to the face was all it took to get him out of the way. He wasn't her target after all._

_Summoning a strong gust of wind, the children were blown away from her father. Smiling, she pointed her shadowy weapon at the man, now he would pay for all the suffering she endured, all the sorrow in her heart. And for planting the first seeds of darkness within her._

_“FALL!!!”_

~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The fifth and final work in Kalai’s main series, Lights Lessons, is scheduled to go live Saturday 8/3/19 regardless of whether this is done by then (it should be) since I really want the first chapter of that ready before KH OC Week.


	5. Lighting The Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit hits the fan. I really tried to think of a better summary to this but nothing came so yeah...

~~~

 

_Kalai's Journal Entry ~ Who I Am_

_I'm a murderer. That's what I am. It doesn't matter if that creature was the one to kill Lord Rowan, it was my own darkness that drove her to do it. My anger at him. My hatred of him. My darkness is what destroyed him. The shadow was right all along._

_How is it that I can look at my sisters in the face anymore? What have I done? To make matters worse, Even said the darkness in my heart can't be extracted without fracturing it in the process. There is no hope. I have no other option but to try to banish it myself of my own will._

_But how can I? How can I when it is so strong that it can destroy another person? True, my stepfather probably had a lot of darkness in him already, but that's not the point. That is not who I want to be._

 

~~~

"She's coming this way with that cute little dog of hers!"

Perfect! Aeleus was still in the outer gardens on the far side of the castle. They would have to move quickly if their plan was to succeed. Kalai motioned for Adelen to follow her around a nearby corner and wait for Miss Daphne to come closer. They saw her only a few moments later, her little dog trotting beside her. 

"You think this will work?" Asked the younger girl. 

"It won't if you don't keep quiet," Kalai replied softly. 

In the next moment, she placed two fingers in her mouth and made a whistle that caught the dog's attention at once. He followed the direction of the sound, causing his owner to give chase. 

"Theo! Theo!" She called out. "Get back here!"

The dog did not hear her, or better yet, was not listening. It was as if he instinctively knew what was going. Because he continued to run through the gardens all the way up to the redheaded guardsman. Kalai and Adelen watched hidden from a distance with giddiness in their hearts. 

Aeleus glanced down at the dog with a kindly expression that soon vanished into redness at the sight of Miss Daphne. She blushed as well, embarrassed that of all places Theo could have led her to, he had to lead her to the guardsman who could make her heart go with a single glance of his kind blue eyes. 

"Uh...um..." He stammered, picking up the animal. "Does this little one belong to you, Miss?"

"Ye...yes…" she replied shyly. "I...hope, he wasn't bothering you."

"Oh no." A smile came to his face in spite of his bashfulness. "I...I love dogs."

"Really?" Her eyes lit up. "Me too!"

A gentle tap on Adelen's shoulder told her that it was time for her and her sister to go. Their plan had worked. Laughing joyfully, they made their way back to the castle. 

"This really had been too much fun!" Kalai said, smiling down at her sister. "I'm really looking forward to the ball now!"

"Me too!" Adelen beamed. "But, it sucks that…" She paused, unsure if she should say what was on her mind. 

"Sucks that what?"

"That...well...I had asked your dad if there was anyone that you love and…"

Despite a sharpness coming into her stomach, Kalai laughed and placed a teasing hand on the younger girl's sandy head. 

"What did he tell you?"

"That...the one you love is in another world, and it's not likely they will be able to come anytime soon... I'm sorry...is it hard to talk about?" 

Kalai hesitated. "No, not really. Not anymore. When hearts share a strong bond, nothing can separate them for long." It was as if her own words were helping her. "They'll come back. Our separation is only temporary, but for now, I'm happy helping my friends find the same happiness and love I've found. Wouldn't you agree?"

"Yeah!" Adelen smiled. "First Iris and Ienzo, and now Aeleus with Miss Daphne! It's wonderful and maybe one day...AHHHHH!!!"

She thrust herself against her older sister as three Shadows appeared before them, followed by the blaring of the castle alarm seconds later. Kalai pulled out her lance.

"Damnit! Where are they all coming from now?"

Heartless had been increasing in number as of late. Between the guards and the Restoration Committee, they managed to have it mostly under control. Still, it was very unsettling and a reminder to Ansem The Wise of his horrible past mistakes. After making quick work of them, Kalai pulled at her sister's hand, and they continued making their way home at a faster pace than before.

~~~

Once home, they found their uncle discussing something with Dilan, Ienzo, and Leon. There was a defined look of concern on all their faces.

"Thank goodness." Said Ansem. "You've made it back safely." 

"Are they finally gone?"

"For now." Leon folded his arms. "But it'll only be a matter of time 'till they come back. We were discussing canceling the winter festival as a precaution." 

"Oh no!"

Adelen glanced up at Kalai with worry. She nodded, seeming to understand what the younger girl was thinking. 

"Is that really necessary?" She asked. "Between myself, the Restoration Committee and the guards, we can manage the Heartless threat right?"

"She's right, and besides," Ienzo added. "To cancel would show to the people that the threat of darkness is still strong enough to be serious, even after the realm has been restored to its former glory." 

"It _is_ serious!" Ansem replied. "I will not have any more of my people fall to it! Not after…" 

His voice trailed off but everyone understood without him having to say anything more. Kalai spoke up again. 

"Leon, tell Yuffie and the others to be on high alert. Security around the castle will already be heightened for the day and if push comes to shove, we can still use the towns defense mechanism Cid created. With all that in mind, there is no need to cancel something that brings the people so much happiness."

Ansem gave thoughts to her words, as did Dilan. 

"I'm with Kalai on this one. To cancel would imply there is still instability in the realm, casting doubt among the people."

Leon did not respond, only nodding and glancing towards Ansem to give the final decision. The older man sighed as he folded his hands together in his lap thoughtfully. 

"Very well." He said. "We will not cancel. Kalai, my dear, consider this your first true duty in service to Radiant Garden. Understood?"

"Yes."

Kalai allowed herself a small smile at the idea of being given a chance to really prove herself worthy.

"I promise. I will not fail again."

"We have no doubt," Dilan replied. 

~~~

As a child, Kalai was rarely allowed outside the castle walls. Her father was always overprotective of her to a fault. From the balconies of the castle, she would watch the yearly celebrations in the Capital, always wishing she could join in the fun. 

This would be her first time truly being a part of the celebrations, and she would not miss it for the world.  And for the world she would not let the Heartless cause any more harm to her world and its people. These were her thoughts as she returned to her room for the night.

Out of fear that her shadowy other would return to her with even worse nightmares than before, Kalai had made a recent habit of sleeping as little as possible at night and waiting until dawn to try to catch a few precious hours of rest before starting her day. Tonight was no different as she sat up in her bed, thinking and writing in her journal. 

She had half-expected that her shadow would still torment her even if she did not sleep. To her surprise, she did not come. But it did not give her much relief. She was certain she would try something again soon and she had to be ready. 

A sick chill seized her entire body as a familiar, callous voice echoed around her. Kalai jumped up from her bed, her lance in hand as her eyes scanned the area around her for signs of Zexion or her shadowy other. No sign of either. Had she imagined it? No. In the next moment she could hear what seemed like footsteps in the hallway, a low and devious chuckle vibrated in her ear as the footsteps became louder and her fingers tightened around the weapon. 

 

Crying.

 

Her lance slipped from fingers almost impulsively at the sound of Iris calling out to her, followed by a soft knock on the door. Kalai went to it at once. Her sister was trembling, tears sliding down her pale face.

"Iris...why are you…"

"I can't take it anymore!" She sniffed. "Kalai, you have to tell me!" 

Iris did not wait for any response but barged into her room and slumped onto the bed. Kalai did not object and took a seat beside her. 

"Tell you what, sis?" She asked, though she felt as if she already knew. Was the shadow now so audacious to torment those around her now? "What...why are you crying?"

"I had a bad dream." Replied Iris. "No...more like a horrendous nightmare. Ienzo was in it, but...it wasn't Ienzo. But it looked a lot like him."

The same sick chill from before shot up her body even as she hugged her sister's warmth to her. She continued to listen.

"Kalai...I know you and Adelen tease me but…" Burying her face in the crook of her neck. "I really do like him! I...think I might love him! But that thing in my nightmare...it...it wasn't him, was it?" 

"No…"

Iris could feel the heaving of Kalai's chest as she took several deep breaths, trying her best to figure out how best to tell her the awful truth in this.

"You...want to know what happened to Adelen and me in the data portal, don't you?"

"Yes...why won't you…"

"Iris...what you saw...what we saw, that's not who he is...not anymore…"

"Huh?!"

She pulled away from her older sister, her blue eyes wide with fear and confusion. Kalai smiled sadly as she reached out and wiped away a few remaining tears from her face.

"It's a very long story, Sis." She said. "Long and very complicated. But I will tell you what you must know now. A long time ago, that terrible image was Ienzo. I...once had a similar image to myself. But like you said yourself, that wasn't him. That's not who we are anymore."

_With all my heart I hope you understand one day, just how sorry I truly am..._

The redhead felt herself already confused despite her sister not telling her what she perceived to be the more confusing elements of this. But she continued to listen.

"Ienzo he...he has a tremendous amount of guilt about what has happened. He's made amends for his past mistakes, we all have. But he holds his guilt more than others."

_What I must atone for is something I don't know yet if I'm worthy of forgiveness for…_

"If you truly care for him, then perhaps you can use that love to reach out to him, pulling him back into the light before the darkness of the past consumes him."

Kalai was not the only one suffering. But unlike herself, Ienzo had someone to comfort him. Someone to keep his heart in the light. What had begun as a shallow ploy to keep Iris away from her, she could now see was real and true. And she could not think of anyone who deserved it more than he.

There was silence between them for several moments minutes before more footsteps could be heard in the hallway. Kalai held Iris tightly, her mind still on high alert. But it was only Ienzo, looking quite exhausted and strangely uncomfortable. 

"Uh...I was...looking for you." He said, turning to Iris. "But you weren't in your room, I thought maybe…"

The older girl gave her sister one last encouraging hug, and a look that told her that she should leave now and go to him. Iris understood. She got up and immediately wrapped her arms around the young man. At once, embarrassment shot up both his and Kalai's face, this was not what either had been expecting, but it was not unwelcome. After a few shocking moments, he returned her embrace and softly pulled her towards the door. 

"I'll see you two in the morning." 

And it was in Kalai's smile that Ienzo could see, for the first time in many months, he was truly forgiven for his mistakes against her. But when they left her room, she fell back onto her bed, seized in an immediate torrent of sorrow as she silently wished for the same comforting warmth they were currently sharing with each other. Her tearful eyes moving towards the bangle on her wrist as she brought it close to her heart. 

~~~

This was not the first time Kalai had donned the uniform of the Royal Guard, but it was the first time she had done so as a true member of their ranks and not as a trainee. Even if her ceremony was not for another day, Dilan had decided that she could officially begin her duties by maintaining order at the festival and keeping the civilians safe.

"But that does not mean you should forego your enjoyment completely." He said to her as they made their way into town. "Even we are allowed to have a little fun today."

"I understand." She smiled. "But...do I have to wear this hat too?" Referring to the square mass of black fur that was part of the winter uniform. "I feel like there's a dog on my head."

"I'd like to think it didn't use to be a dog." Dilan laughed. "But yes, you must. Your entire vestment is a symbol of your service to the realm. A _complete_ symbol."

She nodded at the emphasis he put on this, giving her head one more pat before they went their separate ways. As Kalai walked down the decorated streets, she received many compliments from the townspeople. Her new uniform suited her very well, she was indeed a jewel in the crown of the kingdom.

"Well now," Lea grinned at her when she met up with him, Isa and Adelen. "Today you look more like a prince rather than a princess!" 

"She really does! Like a handsome prince!" 

"Is that your own way of complimenting me?"

"It is!" Adelen smiled. "And I love the hat!" 

"Here! Take it then!" Kalai laughed as she placed hers on the sandy brown head. Only to have Isa place Lea's on her head when she was not noticing.

"Lea's hair isn't suitable for hats." He smirked. "But you can't use that excuse!"

They ended up spending many fun hours together, playing games and occasionally flinging snow at each other. There was little that Kalai and Lea really had to do in regards to guard duties. Most of the townspeople behaved themselves outside the occasional unruly teen or drunk. There were also next to no Heartless, Cid's defense mechanism working out a lot better than they had anticipated. 

All throughout their time out though, none of them had come across Iris or Ienzo. Kalai knew they were at the festival too, or at least not still at the castle. She began to wonder where they were, and if they were together. 

"They should be together!" Isa said, grinning down at the two. "Considering all you two have done to get them together!" 

"How much longer do you think it will be 'till they're married?" Asked Adelen. 

"I think we have a little while before then!" Kalai laughed. "But not too long, I hope, don't you think he'd made an awesome brother for us?"

"I do! And he's a thousand times nicer to both of us than Lucio ever was! If I'm really honest, Lea and Isa have been better brothers to me than he was too!" 

"Huh?! What?" Isa blushed. 

"You think so?" Lea chuckled. "Well, Adelen, I don't think Isa would have a problem with that. And neither do I." He closed his arms around her and lifted her off the ground, much to her amusement. "Starting today. I'm your honorary big brother! So get it memorized!"

~~~

All the while, the two young scholars were spending their time together on their own. Some distance from the others in their group. Iris had wanted this time alone with Ienzo to speak to him about different things that were on her mind. But in the end, she found it more difficult than she thought it to be, being alone with him temporarily making her heart feel timid. 

He also had many things he wanted to tell her. Now that it seemed that forgiveness was becoming more of a reality. Though he also felt timid around her, there was something very comforting about Iris' presence, similarly to how he always felt around Kalai in the old days before the Organization. It was not known to him just how much Iris knew about his past, but the more time he spent around her, the more he felt that it may not matter anymore. 

They made their way to one of the gardens outside the town walls, not many people were there, and they decided to sit for a while. Finally, Iris was the first to speak up.

"Ienzo…" She began. "Do you remember when you told me that you had done something you didn't know you were worthy of forgiveness of?"

"I do…"

"Well, I still don't believe that. No one is perfect. We shouldn't dwell on the past if we can make the future better."

"Iris…" Closing his eyes, he contemplating her words and what would be best to say next. She was so kind, so good, and did not deserve to be hurt. Just as he had hurt her sister. "I did many terrible things, but of all the atrocities I committed, the worst thing was hurting someone I love. Hurting them to the point, she couldn't even look at me…"

"Someone you...love?"

"Someone I used to love."

Her heart sank as she recalled the day Adelen had wandered into the Garden of Assemblage, and when she and Kalai had returned from the portal, how distressed the latter had been. Something that Ienzo's shadowy other had said to her during her nightmare stood out to now more than anything else: _I suppose you will make a decent replacement._

 

_Replacement_

 

 She was beginning to understand.

"Kalai…" She murmured, doing her best to bite back tears. "You love...Kalai."

"No."

Sharpness seized her stomach as she turned away from his gaze as her tears began to burn past her eyes. 

"I'm such an idiot! Why did I think that I could just barge into your lives and…"

Ienzo pulled Iris into his arms, eliciting a gasp from her lips choked by sobs. It was so sudden, so intense, and she could not help but yearn for his warmth. Even if it was all in her silly mind.

"Iris…" He whispered. "I'm sorry for what I did to Kalai, but...if what you say is true, then perhaps I can also be worthy of a second chance to love someone properly."

"I...won't be anyone's replacement."

"You aren't a replacement!" He held her even tighter than before and slowly she found herself melting into his embrace. "You aren't a replacement, Iris. You...I…"

His words were drowned out by several screams of terror. They pulled away from each other to see several Heartless terrorizing the people around them. One of the shadows jumped out at Iris, but Ienzo placed himself in front of her.

"Stay away from her!"

At once he summoned a stream of light that vanquished the dark monsters, only to have more show up seconds later. It was not lost on Iris how he had defended her, and she also felt as though she should also protect him as well. Extending her hand, she froze several of the creatures beginning to surround them. 

"You demons really need to learn some decorum!" 

Her magic had greatly improved but there was still so much they could do without weapons of their own. After making sure the garden was clear of civilians, they made their way back into town themselves. Only to be cornered by a shadow that seemed larger than the rest, and far more vicious. As if it had it's manic golden eyes out for them specifically. 

~~~

The outer gardens were not the only place Heartless were now reeking havoc. Though between the defense mechanisms and the aid of the Restoration Committee, they did not pose as bad a threat as they did outside the city. Kalai, Lea and Isa managed to fight them off with the help of  Dilan while Leon took Adelen to Merlin's house until the crisis had passed. But they began to realize again that they had not seen Iris or Ienzo for quite some time. 

"Last I saw them, they were making their way to the gardens." Dilan had said once they had dealt with the monsters in the Central Square. 

"I have to go find them!" Kalai replied. "They might be in the outer gardens as well!"

She was right. As Kalai made her way to the gardens, she was cornered more than a few times by the dark creatures. They were felled by her with relative ease but as she continued running, she began to hear the familiar, malicious laughter ringing in her ear. The laughter of her demonic shadow. 

_This is going to be so much fun!_

Her body stopped, her weapon drawn. 

"WHERE ARE YOU?!"

_You'll see soon enough._

The laughter continued, and the fear began to pool inside her heart. It seemed like it was getting louder the closer she came to her destination. What if…no!

Impulsively, her feet tried to stop, but she would not have it. Kalai would not let it stop her. Not anymore. 

"Iris! Ienzo!"

A protective barrier surrounded them as a Demon Tower twisted wildly around them. Kalai wasted no time summoning a fierce gale that pushed the shadows away, long enough for them to make their way back into town. 

But before they could reach the gates, the same relentless shadow from before jumped in front of them, charging at Iris as she ran back down the bridge. Ienzo followed behind it as the demon pushed her against the edge, bringing her dangerously close to making contact with the icy waters below. 

"You're mine now!" 

Terror flashed in her deep blue eyes as the creature spoke to her for the first time. It's voice sounding too familiar for comfort. And that's when it's form began to change. This thing...this demon...it was the same thing that took her father away! But that was not even the scariest part of this realization.

The demon, it was Kalai. 

"BE GONE!"

Ienzo threw himself in front of the girl as he tried to fend it off. This just made the demon all the more determined, it jumped back, summoning a weapon alarmingly similar to the one Iris remembered all too well as having struck down her father. She buried her face into him, praying silently for the nightmare to end. 

"WHY DO YOU TWO GET TO HAVE LOVE AND I CAN'T?!"

"THAT'S ENOUGH!"

Without another thought, Kalai pounced onto Kali, yanking her away from them with all her might.

"Your fight is not with them! It's with me! I will not let your darkness terrorize us anymore!" 

"Oh, really?!"

Kali summoned her own gale that pushed Kalai back to the opposite edge of the bridge. Her golden eyes flashed with murderous intent, but Kalai refused to show any fear.

"Run, you two! NOW!"

"Sis!"

"DO AS I SAY!"

They ran back to town as quickly as they could. Kalai pushed the shadow back from her before pointing her lance at its neck.

"We settle this now!" She said. "There may be darkness in my heart, but I refuse to let it have sway over me any longer!"

"I'm doing you a favor!" Kali spat out. "I'm destroying all those who have hurt you!"

"How is that helping?! All you've done is cast shadows upon my heart! You took Iris and Adelen's father! Whatever his own darkness was, it solved nothing!"

She lunged at Kali, using her free hand to summon a ball of fire that the shadow managed to dodge before summoning a fireball of her own, though darker. From her hand, her shadowy version of Stormborn appeared.

"Darkness begets darkness!"

"Exactly! OUR darkness, as you call it, has done nothing but create more darkness! I draw the line here! My light will push the darkness away, starting with YOU!"

"Insolent bitch!" 

Their weapons clashed, Kali pushed Kalai back towards the edge, pointing her own weapon at her neck and smiling manically. 

 "If you want to continue being stubborn, then fine! I will drown you into the abyss!"

"Not unless I drown you first!"

Kalai raised her lance in front of her in defense but her shadow would not back down for anything. She could feel her body being pushed further over the edge and it was all she could do to keep herself from falling. Summoning wind did little and she could only hold her guard for so long. 

"I will drown you into the abyss!"

Hands descended upon her neck and with it, darkness enveloped her. Her lance fell as she struggled to fight back from the demon's hold on her. Slowly she could feel her darkness possessing her, creeping around her heart like an ominous cloak. Kalai would not have it. 

"I'LL DROWN YOU!" 

With one last forceful pull, she yanked the shadow away, only for Kali to de-materialize a second later and throw herself into her. Plunging them both into the frigid depths of the sea. 

~~~

 

_Falling_

 

_Falling_

 

_Falling_

 

The blades of a thousand frozen knives shot through her the second Kalai felt her body make contact with the water. But to her surprise, she was still conscious, aware of the light of the surface quickly fading from her view as her body fell deeper and deeper. On instinct, she forced her body upward but could feel something drag her down.

 

"KALAI! KALAI!"

 

_No...this can't be it...this can't be the end!_

 

"SHE FELL OFF THE BRIDGE!"

 

_It doesn't have to be. Embrace me, and I will free you from this watery fate…_

 

"WE HAVE TO SAVE HER!"

 

_If those are my only options, I think I'd be better off fighting you off myself!_

 

_Hmmph…insolent until the end…_

 

And with that, light. Light so bright it was blinding. But strangely enough...it was warm…

~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m ashamed to admit that I actually cried when this chapter was done. I don’t care if this chapter is shit compared to the others! Writer's block is the worse!


	6. Radiant Nobility

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Information: Defeat Anti-Kalai!

~~~

_Falling…_

 

_Falling…_

 

_Not into darkness..._

 

_Into...light…_

 

The light blinded her momentarily and she shut her eyes in reflex. When Kalai opened them again, she found herself staring down at a beautifully bewildering image. Slowly her body was making its way down towards a circular image etched in vibrant stained glass. 

In the center, was her, sleeping in the background that appeared to be the castle that she called home. Surrounding her were the images of those she cared about most; her father, her sisters, Marluxia, Larxene and the other apprentices. All of which was bordered with emblem of the Sacred Heart, the sigil representing Kingdom Hearts and the crest of the realm. 

Her feet touched the floor. At once she pulled out her weapon. This was not over. 

“You don’t know when to quit do you?”

Kali stared down at her from the opposite end of the station, but her weapon was not drawn. Not yet. 

“Always stubborn. Never accepting anything you didn’t like without kicking and screaming first. I should have known you would be equally as stubborn in accepting me.”

Kalai glared at her, lance pointed and ready to attack.

“But what I don’t understand is why. After all that’s happened, after all you’ve endured, how can you still refuse the darkness? Why do you still refuse me?”

“Simple!” She replied. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, maybe your own heart is too black with hatred to see. But it was the darkness that first brought all this suffering in the first place! My stepfathers, my other siblings, Xehanorts and even Zexion’s to an extent. Their darkness brought upon more darkness and the cycle just continued and brought upon more darkness in those around them!”

She could see the shadowy spear begin to materialize in Kali’s hand. This was it. She could to this, she had to. 

“I now understand what Iris meant by breaking the cycle.” She continued. “And now, it’s my turn. I'm no longer going to live in the past. The light of the future will guide me!”

“Ha! We’ll see about that!”

Of all the battles Kalai had fought, of all the challenges she had to face, none was greater than what was happening now. She did not know if she could vanquish the darkness in her heart forever, but at the very least, she had to try. It could not be allowed any longer to have such a hold over her. 

Kali was truly a daunting opponent; swift, relentless and with nearly all the powers she possessed as a Nobody but somehow more powerful than Alixka had ever been. But Kalai had her own power that was possibly even stronger, her stubbornness. 

Even when all she knew was anger and hatred as a lonely child, she refused to accept it. Even when Marluxia and Larxene were torn away from her in Castle Oblivion and all hope seemed lost, she refused to accept it. And when she was brought before Master Xehanort and forced to become his vessel, Kalai refused to accept it. 

She was a fighting spirit, one that would never be so easily broken. 

 

“Let the noble strength in my heart consume you!”  

 

She leapt forward toward the shadow and used her lance to run through her in one final blow. Both shadow and true form cried out as the impact resonated between both of them. Kali latched onto Kalai’s shoulders and tightly pressed their bodies together in her final moments.

“You....are strong.” She whispered. “But...this is not the end.”

“Yes. It is.”

“Oh no, Kalai. Far from it. So long as there is darkness, so long as it exists in your heart, even in the smallest measurement, I will be with you. Always.”

Kali pulled away from her true form with a smile almost genuine, as though she were happy. Her final act was to kiss her before her body fully disintegrated into dark fragments of nothingness. 

 

_“We will meet again.”_

 

The second she was gone Kalai collapsed onto the stained glass floor, her body thoroughly drained. It was not known what would happen now, if she would be stuck in this strange place forever or be returned to her own world. Somehow though, it did not matter to her. Kalai had taken on her darkness and had won, come what may, she would be safe.

~~~

“Kalai! Kalai! Open your eyes!”

Choked gasps dragged her from her unconscious state and her eyes bolted open. At once Dilan nearly suffocated her in a possessive embrace. The warmth slowly brought Kalai back to reality and she responded by placing her arms around him as well. Her face covered with many kisses. 

“Thank goodness!” He sighed. “You...really must stop scaring me like that, sweet girl.” 

She laughed a little in spite of the overwhelming emotion currently pulling at her heart. A part of her was still trying to comprehend that all that had just happened had been real. But in the next moment she found herself swept up in the arms of her sisters, both of them doing their best to conceal their tears, even if they were tears of the happy kind for once. 

“Kalai...you saved me and Ienzo! Thank you!”

“Why do you always get to have all the fun?”

“Adelen!”

They laughed and Kalai turned her eyes to Ienzo who was standing close behind Iris with eyes full of kindness and concern. In hers he no longer saw the terror that she so often had whenever she saw him or even heard his voice. Without any warning she jumped up and threw her arms around him, It surprised him but he accepted her affection wholeheartedly. The sins of the past were finally behind him.

“Oh...oh no…” 

Kalai touched the top of her head, feeling only her damp hair. The hat that she had so disliked had probably fallen off at some point and was now lost in the depths below. She turned to her father with a small smile.

“I’m sorry...I...lost my hat…”

“Don’t you mean MY hat?!”

Lea folded his arms together and regarded her with a mock angry look that quickly melted into a smirk and in the next moment he was laughing. She laughed too, they all did.

~~~

She was still recovering, she could have easily contracted hypothermia. Nevertheless Kalai was adamant that none of the New Years celebrations be postponed or cancelled on her account, especially her proclamation. It was fifteen minutes to midnight when she entered the chapel gowned in shimmering mauve silk. At the front stood her father, uncle, Ienzo and Aeleus. Though she had rehearsed this moment countless times in her mind, she could feel the butterflies beginning to flutter in her stomach as she approached them. Ansem the Wise regarded his niece with a kind smile.

“Iris informed me of the bravery of your actions yesterday.” He said. “You have grown immensely, well done, my dear.”

“Thank you.”

Warmth rose to her face and she allowed herself a brief glance over at her sisters, sitting at the front and watching expectantly. Dilan stepped forward, holding in his hand a medal of the Sacred Heart upon a ribbon of blue silk. 

“I’m certain you remember the oath?” He asked. 

“I do.” 

“Good, then place your hand upon the Sacred Heart and swear your loyalty to the realm and it’s lord.”

Kalai obeyed him, taking in a deep breath to help calm herself as she spoke out the words of the oath that would formalize her place in the Royal Guard.

“I Kalai, daughter of Dilan and Ilise, do solemnly swear upon this Sacred Heart, my fealty and service to Radiant Garden and to its Lord and Ruler Ansem the Wise.”

She made sure to keep her head up as her father had instructed her. The weight of the words washed over her but she kept her voice steady.

“And will do to the best of my ability, uphold and maintain the stability of this realm and safeguard all who inhabit it. I will serve as a living example of justice and diligence, honor and integrity, _strength and nobility_.”

She and Dilan shared a private smile, the last part being a slight change from the original oath, made with Ansem’s approval. It seemed so perfect, was it not what her name represented after all?

“Until my last dying breath.”

He nodded his approval and placed the medal around her neck. It was heavy and in a way Kalai could feel the weight of her new duties in it, but she continued to hold her head high. In the next moment Dilan presented her with a brand new lance crafted specifically for her, her previous one having been lost in the sea. 

“Radiant Nobility.” He said. “Virtuous and dynamic, it will assist you in your new role. Use it well. To protect the honest and good and punish the wicked and deceitful.” 

“I promise.” 

Radiant Nobility was a beautifully ornate lance, deep violet in color and etched with gold. As she closed her hands around her new weapon, she felt very similarly to how it felt to hold Stormborn for the first time. But somehow this was even better. After holding it back for so long, a smile came to Kalai’s face. One of triumph in finally finding the sense of purpose she had always wanted. 

“The Jewel of Radiant Garden.” She heard her father murmur. 

The bells of the chapel rung out announcing midnight, the new year had finally come. 

~~~

The ball was soon after this. The Great Hall shimmered under the light of many candles and chandeliers, and the colors of all the elegantly dressed attendants. Kalai spent the better part of the first half of the night receiving many congratulations and good wishes from everyone. She smiled and received them all with a thankful and hopeful heart. Never had she felt so accomplished. 

Later that evening, Adelen noticed that Iris was nowhere to be seen and neither was Ienzo. She nudged her older sister and they decided to go look for them. They found the two young scholars standing together right outside in the courtyard, their backs turned to them and seemingly oblivious to the fact that they were being watched. The way he placed his arm around their sister prompted them to force their eyes away from the scene before it got too sweet for their liking. 

Back inside, they immediately saw Aeleus and Miss Daphne chatting together on the other side of the room. Her blue gown was very beautiful on her and he clearly thought so too. They giggled to themselves as they watched him guide her to the dancefloor. Their matchmaking schemes had been a success. 

“You know, we make a good team!” Adelen grinned. 

“Yeah, I think so too.” Kalai replied. “And now…”

“Now we have to find girlfriends for the rest of the apprentices!”

“That’s...not what I was going to say, I was going to say that now we need to find someone special for YOU!” 

“WHAT?!” The younger girl blushed. “No way! Don’t be silly!”

“What? You don’t think so?”

“No I don’t!” 

“Hey! You two little sirens done with your scheming?!”

Both girls made faces at Lea and Isa but in the next moment they were laughing along with them. Lea extended a hand to the younger girl in an exaggerated gesture of chivalry. 

“May I have this dance, little sis?”

“Oh Lea! You clown!”

But she obliged him all the same and smiled as he lifted her up and took her to the dancefloor. Isa and Kalai watched them, left behind and staring at each other for several moments. As if silently wondering if they should join them. Finally Isa spoke up.

“I know what you’re thinking.” He said. “And you can forget it!”

“I wasn’t thinking a single thing!” She replied. “Certainly not with you!”

“Good, we are in agreement!” 

She made a face at him as he walked away. Even though she liked Isa far more now than before, his Saix side could still be seen at times. Standing alone, she watched everyone with a strange sense of sickness that made no sense to her. But she knew where it was coming from, of course she would be thinking of them even now. In her mind she thought of what they would say if they could be there with her. She smiled in spite of her sadness. 

 

_How beautiful you look, Rosebud. Truly like a princess._

 

_Don’t either of you even THINK about asking me to dance! That is so not my thing!_

 

“It’s too perfect a night to be here by yourself, my sweet girl.”

Dilan smiled at his daughter, extending his hand to her. She took it without hesitation as he led her to the dancefloor. There was still love in her life, and in her heart.

Towards the end of the night, Kalai walked out into the courtyard alone. The snow covered garden was illuminated with the special flowers that welcomed the new year. She smiled as she recalled an instance on another night many years ago that was very similar to this one. Gowned in purple and tearfully confessing how alone she felt in the world to a man she had secretly wished could be her father. At that time, she was convinced that no one loved her and it was her own fault. Now she could see how untrue that was. 

As she walked silently through the garden, one flower in particular caught her eye. The Capital of Light was known for its beautiful and fragrant flowers and she had been raised to have a deep love for them. Despite this, something in her heart always had a soft spot for dandelions. She had often heard them being described as weeds, but she didn’t think so. For a long time she thought of herself as something of a weed too. But truthfully, they were very similar to Kalai. They could grow nearly everywhere and in near any weather and thrive. In their own way, dandelions were noble and strong as well. 

“Hey! Found you!” 

Kalai turned her attention to Iris and Adelen. The redhead looked slightly miffed but the younger girl only grinned with mischievous delight. 

“Adelen told me about you leaving that Frost Gem in Ienzo’s room and telling him it was from me!” She said. “Why would you…”

“Oh come on! Don’t blame her!” Retorted Adelen. “You were going to give it to him anyway, weren’t you?”

“Not the point!” 

Kalai merely shrugged and laughed when her sister briefly gave chase to her, ending it with a snowball being flung at her. 

“Whatever, Iris!” She said. “You won’t be mad at us anymore when you two are married and you become queen!”

“SHUT UP!”

They laughed at their sister’s embarrassment, Iris smiled in spite of herself. It had taken a long time, but they were finally beginning to become close. As close as they had all secretly hoped they could one day be. 

“Just wait until your lovers come back!” Iris smirked. “We will taunt you to no end!”

“They kind of already do that, but fine by me!” 

“What are they like?” Asked Adelen. “I don’t think you’ve ever told us.”

Kalai blushed as the stared at the dandelion in her hand and thought about how best to describe them.

“Well, one of them is extremely passionate. Passionate, sweet and loves flowers. Some may say that he’s cold but I know the truth. And...he could fill pages upon pages with the poetic things he would say to me.”

“That sounds so wonderful.”

“Yes, and the other one, well, she can also come off as cold but secretly has a very sweet heart. Even though she can be kinda bitchy, if she likes you, she will gladly die for you. And that’s what makes her so awesome to be around.”

She held out the dandelion against the moonlit sky. Closing her eyes and smiling, she blew the seeds into the cold night air and watched as they flew away, far from her and into the unknown. In her heart she thought of the dandelion seeds reaching them, wherever they were, it was possible. 

“They’ll come back.” Said Kalai. “And when they do, my heart will be doubly re-complete.”

“Doubly?” Iris gazed at her thoughtfully.

“Yes, because my heart is already complete. With my father, with our uncle, with the other apprentices, and with you two. I have enough love to last me a lifetime. They will only make it even better.” 

Iris did not fully understand her sister, but she felt as if she understood enough to know that her sister was finally beginning to become happy. She was happy too and so was Adelen. Their decision to come to the The Capital of Light  had been the right one after all. Taking her older sisters hand and the hand of her younger one, they made their way back into the castle.

~~~


	7. Return of Spring (FINAL CHAPTER)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> None, let’s wrap this sh*t up so we can move on to Lights Lessons. Note there are some references to my Scala fic in this last chapter.

~~~

_“So that’s the castle from her dreams?”_

_“It looks so much better now, compared to when this place was called Hollow Bastion.”_

_“For the life of me, I don’t understand how anyone could think of such a ghastly name for this place.” Their host chuckled as he poured some more tea for them. “But sometime after Maleficent was destroyed, and after that lad Sora returned to take care of the Heartless, everyone suddenly remembered the true name of this realm. Doesn’t it sound far better than Hollow Bastion?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“So tell me, how do you two know Miss Kalai?”_

_A red tint came to both of their faces as they shared a knowing glance before the pink-haired man decided to answer for them._

_“We met, about two years ago. We were all...friends. But...we were separated some time ago and we’ve been looking for her ever since. Our search for her is what has brought us to Radiant Garden.”_

_“Ah, I see. Well your search has brought you to the right place. She lives in the castle with her family and recently became a member of the Royal Guard beside her father. I visit her weekly to give her instruction in magic.”_

_“Really?” The blonde’s lips curved into a sarcastic grin. “So, can you tell us, have her skills with thunder improved any at all?”_

_The wizard sighed._

_“I’m afraid not.” They all laughed at this._

_They thanked Merlin for his hospitality and continued making their way through the town towards the castle. As they descended the long stairs, butterflies began to seize their stomachs. Both were nervous but neither would say so to the other._

_It had been months since their return to humanity. Things were still a blur but they knew before they could do anything else, they had to find their lover. Having been separated from her twice now, they would not be lost to her any longer._

_When they made their way up the final step, they were greeted by a young girl with sandy brown hair who was running around the front with a kite. At once the pink haired man had a thought about another young girl very much like her. With a smile just as charming as hers too. He smiled back._

_“Who are you?”_

_“My name is Lauriam.” He replied. “And this is Elrena. What’s your name, young miss?”_

_“Adelen.”_

_“Well, Adelen. Do you happen to know a young woman by the name of Kalai?”_

_“Kalai?” Her face lit up, and her smile became wider. “I’m her youngest sister!”_

_Elrena could see how Lauriam flinched a little at this; she took his hand and smiled at the girl. Of course, Kalai would have such a sweet younger sister, it was something she and he had in common._

_“Well, Miss Adelen, mind telling your big sis that we’re here? We’ve been looking for her for some time.”_

_She glanced at them for a moment before smiling again._

_“You’re the ones she always talks about, aren’t you? The romantic and poetic one and the sassy but sweet one.”_

_Blush came to both their faces, but they smiled nonetheless. Glad that she had not forgotten them after re-completion and nearly half a year of separation._

_“She’ll be so happy you’ve come for her!”_

_And with that, Adelen ran back into the castle but they stayed outside, unsure if it would be appropriate to follow behind her. They stood outside the front doors for several minutes before someone returned, not Adelen or Kalai, but Dilan and Aeleus._

_At once they took a few steps back and Lauriam gave a respectful bow to them, certain they still held animosity towards them for their actions in the Organization. But when he looked up, he saw a look of kindness in Dilan’s eyes and a smile on Aeleus’ face._

_“Well now.” Dilan began. “You two certainly took your sweet time coming back to her!”_

_The tone in his voice made it difficult for them to determine if he meant it as sarcasm or scolding, but in the next moment, he was laughing, and so was Aeleus. A wave of relief came over them as they gave their real names and shook Dilan's hand, silently accepting the blessing of the father of the girl they loved._

_“We’ve been expecting you.” Said Aeleus. “She’s in the courtyard. You may go in.”_

~~~

Lady Anila seemed just a surprised and delighted to see that she had a granddaughter as Kalai was to know she had a grandmother. They held each other for a long time and in her eyes the elderly woman could see so much of her beloved son. Even at almost ninety, she was a quick wit and age had not faded her agile skill as she took Kalai’s lance and began swinging it around, much to Dilan’s amusement. 

“Your grandfather was a lancer.” She said. “I guess it only made sense that Dilan would become one and now you too.” 

Kalai smiled up at her father, his eyes shining with pride. 

“Still,” She went on. “I can’t help but wish that you may have inherited my own skills. There are so few left in the world.”

“So few of what, grandma?”

“Keyblade Wielders.” 

“HUH?!” Violet eyes widened and she took her grandmother’s hand, hoping she would tell more. “You, you used to be a keyblade wielder?”

“Not just a wielder, child. I was a Master.”

“YOU WERE?!” 

“Mother! You never told me any of this!” The woman laughed.

“There’s a lot of things I never told you about my life, boy!” 

For the next week, Kalai spent nearly every free moment of her day with Lady Anila. Sometimes she would show her different tricks she could perform with her weapon but most times she would tell her granddaughter stories of her youth and her days in a world long gone of white windmills and cable cars gliding across the sea. Sometimes Iris and Adelen would sit with them and were just as enchanted with tales of Scala ad Caelum as their sister was. 

Lady Anila told them about her adventures with the young warrior prince and his consort Ilysia. About their other keyblade wielding friends and how they would sometimes try to play matchmaker for their young sorcerer friend with one of their other friends named Takara. But she did not know, however, how it affected Kalai to hear the name “Xehanort” once more. And Kalai did not say a word to her grandmother on the matter.

On the final day of her visit Lady Anila sat with Dilan, Even and Ienzo as they watched a new portrait being made of Kalai and her sisters. It was something Ansem the Wise had wanted very much, he already had one portrait of Kalai and now he desired to have one of his three nieces together. Naturally, Kalai did not enjoy having to be still for so long and neither did Iris or Adelen. For nearly three hours they stood together in matching gowns of white and red, trying their best to stay still lest Even scold any of them. The old woman smiled. 

“On the morning of her marriage, Ilysia also had to pose for a formal portrait in her wedding garb. She was so weighed down by the heavy clothes and she was holding her keyblade as well. Every five minutes she would complain to Takara and I about how fatigued she was.” 

“I don’t think I ever want to pose for another portrait ever after this!” Kalai replied. 

“Neither do I.” Added Iris. 

“Really?” Adelen couldn’t help but smirk teasingly. “Not even a wedding portrait yourself?”

“Be quiet!” 

“Make me!” 

“How about you all be quiet!” Even snapped. “And stop making the job of the artist more difficult!” 

The sisters all made a face at him before resuming their serene expressions.

~~~

The months passed pleasantly for everyone in the castle and in the Capital. Kalai fell so naturally in her new role with the Royal Guard, it was as though she had been a part of them all her life. She soon learned that many in the Capital were wary of her uncle for his role in the worlds fall to darkness. But through her kind spirit and good intentions, she did her best to help build a stronger bond with the people and their ruler. She still did not know yet know the extent of his crimes, but she knew that his heart was remorseful and kind, and it was her hope that they could all bury the past behind them.

Heartless continued to appear at times, but they no where near a problematic as before. Even when it seemed like their numbers were increasing at times, they would never bring down the Capital of Light again. And between her power and that of those around her, they were able to combat them with ease. 

Spring came and Lea and Isa had left to pay a visit to Roxas and Xion in Twilight Town. And the time was coming soon for Namine’s return to life. The apprentices worked all winter on her completion, the task being more difficult since her existence as a Nobody at all was such a remarkable feat of nature. But now their work was paying off and the girl’s awakening was now imminent. 

When that day finally came, Kalai spent the morning with Adelen picking out some gifts for Namine. On passing by the lab earlier, she noticed that she was still sleeping and still wearing the simple white dress she recalled from their days in Castle Oblivion. Xion and Lea had new things to wear, it seemed only right that Namine also have something new. In addition to a new dress, she also bought the girl some new art supplies and a few books as well. 

This would be their first time seeing each other since Kalai’s last day in Castle Oblivion and the unpleasant nature of that final encounter was not forgotten. She had done her best to be a comfort to the captive girl, for the sake of Kairi of whom she was the Nobody of. But there was only so much she could have done within her position in the Organization and at Marluxia’s side. With no more ulterior motives between them, it was her hope that now she and Namine could truly be friends just as she was now friends with Xion. 

Riku was planning on making a visit to Radiant Garden to see Namine and bring her to Destiny Islands. He would be there soon. Kalai and Adelen made their way to the computer room, Iris was already there standing outside the door and looking in on the process with great expectation. 

“I think her eyes are opening!” She said. “This is so amazing!” 

They crowded each other for a better look at what was happening. Namine was indeed waking up. Kalai’s heart fluttered with warmth but in the next moment she heard frantic crying. 

“DiZ?! No! Nooooo!” 

Namine jumped from the stretcher, looked around quickly before running towards the door and pushed it open, speeding past the three and hardly even noticing her presence. Kalai glanced dumbfounded at the three men. 

"What just happened?" 

“Oh dear.” Ansem sighed. “I should have expected as much.”

“Could one of you go get her please?” Asked Even. 

He did not even have to ask as Kalai was immediately chasing behind the poor girl. She had not gotten far, the basement door leading to the main floor being locked. At one glance at her former friend, Namine’s expression softened, and she ran into her arms at once. They gazed at each other for a moment. She was a little older than before, but her eyes were still wide with fear. The older girl smiled. 

“You’re safe, Nami-dear.” She said kindly. “Why are you running?”

“That man!” Cried the younger girl. “That man wants to kill me!” 

“What man?” 

“She means me, I’m afraid.” 

Kalai turned to her uncle with a look of confusion, she could feel Namine’s grip on her tightened as she buried her face in her chest. She stroked her hair comfortingly. 

“Uncle Ansem…”

“Forgive me, Namine.” He said. “For all I put both you and Roxas through. If there is any reason I still draw breath, it is to make amends to all whose lives I destroyed through my pride, my hatred and lust for vengeance. Including you.”

She did not understand all that her uncle was saying but she understood enough to know that at some point, he had done harm to the frightened girl now clutching to her so desperately. After a few moments, Namine loosened her grip on the older girl and stared at the man thoughtfully. What she saw was no longer the frightening, cruel figure in red and black with his face hidden by a mask with bandages. Though they shared the same voice. She was not yet ready to approach him or even separate herself from the girl now holding her, but even so, she allowed a small smile to appear on her face. 

The sisters spent the remainder of the morning with Namine, dressing her in her pretty new clothes and doing her nails. Soon the fear that Kalai seemed to always see in her eyes began to melt away, and she even heard her laugh some. Even when she was at her most relaxed beside her in Castle Oblivion, she had never seen her like this. So happy and hopeful. Later, when it was time for Namine to leave, Kalai walked her out to the castle gates to await Riku’s arrival.

“I know things were difficult between us in Castle Oblivion.” She said. “But with all my heart, I hope we can now truly be friends.”

“That’s what I’ve secretly always wanted,” Namine replied cheerfully. “That night when it rained, I was so alone and afraid, but when you came to me, I felt like I wanted us to always be close. For the sake of Kalai and Kairi, I felt like I could overlook Alixka’s black coat if she promised to never leave me.”

“None of that matters anymore, Nami-dear.” She hugged her tightly. “I’m no longer Alixka, and you are no longer a prisoner. We’re free, and nothing is keeping us from being friends any longer.” 

In the sky, they could see the gummiship coming closer to the castle. They smiled, and Kalai gently pushed her forward. 

“Your chariot awaits, My Lady. As does your prince.” 

 Kalai did not see Naimine after that, but she knew she was doing well. Apparently, she had decided to stay in Destiny Islands with Riku. Somehow it seemed so perfect to her and she knew she would now be happy and have friends. Maybe one day, if she ever could learn how to traverse worlds without the need of darkness, vessels or a keyblade wielder, she would visit her.

~~~

Finally, one beautiful April morning, Kalai woke up and began her day just as she did any other. It was not known to her yet what would happen today, but such glorious weather was surely an omen for good things to happen, no matter what they were. 

She spent the first part of the morning making her rounds around the castle town, speaking to the civilians about any problems they may have and helping them in any way she could. Later she paid a visit to Miss Daphne who was now spending more time at the castle as of late, spending her time with Aeleus. Finally, she returned home to tend to the flowers in the courtyard before taking up her afternoon post at the front gates. 

Many of the flowers were in full bloom now, and she used her magic to encourage their growth and beauty. The flowers bearing her name seemed even more beautiful this season than they had in previous ones. As if they themselves were now renewed. Kalai understood that there was still darkness in her heart, that the shadow was still there, but she now knew that her heart was strong enough to keep it at bay. Her new life in the light had only just begun, and for nothing, would she let it be destroyed. When the time came again, she would fight to protect it. Kalai would safeguard the light in her heart as well as the light of those she loved. That was her radiant, noble strength.

Adelen approached her, thinly veiled delight shining in her blue eyes. She smiled. 

“Sis, you have a visitor.”

~~~

 

The End

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look! LOOK! DiZ was going to have Riku kill the poor girl! How was she to know that he had a fu*king change of heart? Even if she did, I’m sure she would freak out at seeing any of the Organization members again sans Kalai and Lea maybe. AND WHY DOES EVERYONE GET A SWEET ASS NEW OUTFIT EXCEPT NAMINE?! UGH!!!
> 
> Okay, now that that bit of rage is out of the way, just a word about how I headcanon the ability to wield the keyblade. In addition to being bequeathed the power through touching one belonging to a master or one with master potential, one must also have a strong and worthy heart. Both combined is what will enable someone to have the keyblade’s power. 
> 
> By combating the darkness in her heart and pushing Kali back into a dormant state, Kalai proved herself worthy of having one and was bequeathed the power when she touched Divine Rose. Keyblade’s can be blood inherited but one must still prove themselves worthy of one first. 
> 
> Lady Anila will make more appearances in my Scala work Future Masters. I wrote it before the DLC trailer though so I’m not sure about where I want to take it at the moment, especially since I’ve begun working on Kalai’s AU work. Maybe once I get more feedback I’ll make a decision.
> 
> Even though this was meant to be something of a pause while I finished up work on her main adventure and I suffered a lot of writers block at times, I really did enjoy writing this. I’ve given so much life to Kalai and her story and yet I did not think there was much to her own personality outside her relationships with my favorite Organization bae’s. 
> 
> This was my attempt to fix that since Lights Lessons will focus as much on the other characters (especially Lauriam and Kairi) as it will her. I’m really REALLY looking forward to sharing that work because I’m sure it will be awhile before we get any new canon post KH3 and even less for my favorite sexy treacherous duo or his lost sister. And I’m sure I’m not the only one pissed at how shot Kairi’s character development was in 3 so this fifth and final installment is also my own self indulgent way of fixing all of that.


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